Tag Archive for 'Wonder Woman'

The Top 9 People Michael Jackson Was Trying to Look Like

Published
by
nick marino
on July 3, 2009
in The Top 9
. 1 Comment

Let’s just be honest about this: regardless of his incredible abilities as a performer, Michael Jackson had a mortifying plastic surgery addiction that was impossible to ignore.

I may not know much about plastic surgery, but I can’t imagine it’s something you go into casually without an endgame in mind. Mikey must of had some sort image of what he wanted to look like after all that surgery was done.

Unfortunately, we may never know exactly what MJ’s goal was with all those disturbing facial modifications, but here are my best nine guesses.

9. Superman. Okay, so MJ missed the mark if he was going for a Clark Kent vibe. But you have to admit that the chin implant is very superhero-esque. And when I think of superheroes with a strong chin line, first and foremost I think of Supes. Still, like I said, Michael Jackson wasn’t THAT reminiscent of the Man of Steel. If he was going for a DC Comics hero, he was probably aiming more towards…

8. Wonder Woman. This super Amazon is far more in line with MJ’s final appearance than the guardian of Metropolis. Jacko was obviously going for a feminine look, so maybe he took some cues from Diana of Themyscira (though, upon further scrutiny, MJ looked more like an old school Jack Kirby drawing than any DC superheroine). At the end of the day, whether aiming for Wonder Woman or not, Michael Jackson ended up looking like a…

7. Nightmare. Literally. We all know that Michael Jackson preferred Marvel Comics. And who better to take inspiration from than one of the greats: Steve Ditko. When my friend said MJ looked like a nightmare, I automatically added a capital N on the front. BTW, do me a favor and remember this entry for later on in the list, okay? Anyway, back to the current section of the countdown. MJ, after all was said and done, was far too put together to be going for a Nightmare look. In fact, I would say his desires were more along the lines of…

6. Betty Page. Seriously. With those lips and that silky black hair, MJ was totally going for a high-contrast pinup lady look. Ms. Page was, of course, the most notorious of the black and white pinups. Who better to emulate, right? Well, if Mikey was trying to look like Betty Page, unfortunately he ended up more like…

5. Elizabeth Taylor. Anyone else out there ever find it ironic that Michael Jackson was not only close friends with Elizabeth Taylor but also slowly turning into her? For what it’s worth, I thought about this even as a kid. And while this classic Hollywood starlet certainly inspired millions, I think it’s safe to say that Micheal’s eventual appearance seemed to be inspired a bit more by…

4. Cher. And I’m not talking 1970s Cher. I’m talking modern Cher, like Cher from the Believe video. Even if MJ was trying to look like Cher, he was aiming for the next octave up with his voice. Take that, Cher! When it came to looking like women, you two were tied. But when it came to sounding like women, well, Mikey had you beat there. But don’t fret Cher – at the end of the day, Mike wasn’t your doppelganger. He always reminded me more of…

3. Elvira. You know, the original sexy goth chick. We’ll never know if MJ really wanted to look like Elvira, but visual evidence certainly points in this direction. Hell, maybe he was just jealous and wanted to get the Tom Jones treatment too. But while Elvira always rocked a feathered fashion mullet, Michael appeared to prefer flowing black locks a bit closer to those of…

2. Snow White. The pale skin. The jet black hair. The big red lips. That whole song about talking to a mirror. His love for poisoned apples. Okay, that last one I made up. But the first three all are bonafide facts! Snow White is a pretty huge icon, just like Mike. Maybe he was trying to take the whole iconic thing to the next level. If that’s what his aim was, he was a bit off. Instead of capturing the pale countenance of Snow White, Michael Jackson ended up with the same complexion as…

1. Morbius, the Living Vampire. Not only did MJ have the complexion, he also had the miniature nose and the same exaggerated facial shape as Marvel’s resident anti-hero vampire. Remember when I told you to remember #7? Here’s the payoff: when I told my friend about the Nightmare reference, he agreed but felt that MJ resembled Morbius to a greater degree. And he’s right. The whole Michael Jackson look was very “Living Vampire.” And here’s some visual evidence:

Michael Jackson, the Living Morbius

More: The Top 9 Least Intimidating Supervillains

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

The Top 9 DC Comics Movies Warner Bros. Should Be Making Right Now

Published
by
nick marino
on April 17, 2009
in The Top 9
. 8 Comments

For some reason, Neal was under the impression that this Top 9 list would be about Texas. He was wrong! This is a WAKE UP CALL for Warner Bros. and some REEL TALK (get it? “reel”???) for the film producers behind any future DC Comics properties.

9. Green Arrow. Supermax, eh? What a fucking stupid idea. Why would you introduce Green Arrow to the film audience through a prison breakout movie? Play this one close to the vest and tell the tale of a spoiled rich kid that turns into a modern Robin Hood. It’s that easy. Get some imaginative director to envision fun archery antics (including a slo-mo Matrix style arrow shot, of course) and you’ve got another superhero blockbuster on your hands, Warner Bros.

8. Metropolis. This is an unusual suggestion that could work out unusually well – take the highly successful Smallville TV series and spin it off into a blockbuster film where everything we know about the TV show changes. Let Clark Kent grow up and make the transition that we knew he was always going to make. Bring back familiar cast members – Lex, Lana, and more – while solidifying Clark’s status in the big city. Show Kal-El taking hold of the Superman mantle and growing into his infamous role.

7. Arkham Asylum. A horror movie where the spotlight is on the Batman’s rogues gallery. People already know the cast of characters well… so now give them a freaky thriller where every villain gets the same sort of hyper-serious treatment that Heath Ledger and company gave to the Joker. The story could focus on one frightening night when the prisoners of Arkham get loose inside the building and attempt to escape from the asylum. Tell the story from the viewpoint of a psychiatrist working there. People would love this.

6. Green Lantern. Supposedly, this movie is going to get made soon. But Warner Bros., you’re like the “the film studio that cried wolf” when it comes to superhero movies. I’ll believe that you’re actually making this when I see some production stills or photos from the set. And it’s probably best to go with the John Stewart version of the character – that’s who the public is mostly familiar nowadays. Plus, the DCU film universe could use a bit of diversity.

5. The Daily Planet. A film about the most famous fictional newspaper in the world. Redefine Lois Lane, Jimmy Olsen, and Perry White for the masses. Show what it’s like to cover news in a world where the unbelievable happens on a regular basis. On the whole, this should be largely devoid of Superman (maybe just a little foreshadowing). However, this movie must be developed with the notion that relaunching the Superman franchise as a sequel is a given. As a tease, have the final scene feature a young Clark Kent being introduced to Lois Lane for the very first time.

4. Flash. The character is truly iconic. That’s what he has in spades over most other superheroes. His name alone gives you everything you need to know: it’s all about speed. Plus, the Flash logo makes for incredible merchandising. The marketing potential for this property is tremendous. To top it off, this legacy character has more than one classic iteration. Therefore, you can kill off Barry in the second film (for unparalleled dramatic superhero tension) and have Wally rise to the challenge.

3. Aquaman. As a huge Aquaman fan, I may be a bit biased. But this character is known across the world and beloved by many who grew up on Super Friends. Those two things alone make it the perfect time for an Aquaman movie, which would be a lavish underwater epic. Still need more proof that this should get made? Entourage has already done the viral promotion for the film! Warner Bros., if you wait too damn long then you’ll never be able to capitalize on that free publicity!!!

2. Superman Begins. Yeah, we already have five modern Superman movies, not to mention countless hours of animated film and TV shows, and then there’s Smallville… and a WHOLE LOT MORE. But the Superman film franchise is in the crapper right now. Warner Bros., just admit that Superman Returns didn’t turn out like you expected and relaunch the whole franchise from the beginning. Keep it simple and go with the “Begins” motif that worked wonders for your Batman franchise.

1. Wonder Woman. Seriously, why is there no Wonder Woman movie yet? I know the story blah blah blah Whedon blah blah blah wrote a script blah blah. WHO CARES!?! Just make the damn movie already!!! This is one of the most famous superheroes in the world and all she has right now is a dated (albeit awesome) 70s TV series and a (LAME!) direct-to-DVD animated film. Stop making excuses, Warner Bros., and make a goddamn Wonder Woman movie!

More: The Top 9 WORST Actors in Live-Action Superhero Films.

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

AudioShocker Podcast #74 – Britney Spears vs. Crimson Viper… GO!

Published
by
nick marino
on March 31, 2009
in Podcast Episodes
. 1 Comment

We kick it off with a concert review of the Britney Spears Circus show in Pittsburgh featuring a special surprise interview with Britney herself… okay NOT really, but the Pussycat Dolls were there too, then we dig into the history of the Pussycat Dolls and Nicole Scherzinger, Fierce Diva Tranny Bitch too of course, Justique thinks Ciara looks like a man, Neal can’t finish Rachel Getting Married, Neal enjoyed the epic Sharp Teeth werewolf poem written in free verse, Justique enjoyed The Living and the Dead graphic novel, Nick enjoyed the latest issue of the Street Fighter II Turbo comic book featuring a backup story with Crimson Viper, and more More MORE!

 
 AudioShocker Podcast #74 [51:41m]: Play Now | Download

Profile in Comics Reading: Jeremy Canceko

Published
by
nick marino
on March 19, 2009
in Comics
. 1 Comment

Jeremy CancekoI’m gonna try something new today: a comic book reader bio, spotlighting reading tastes and habits. If you like it, let me know and we can make this a regular thing.

First up is my former classmate and fellow cartoonist, Jeremy Canceko (by “fellow cartoonist” I mean “cartoonist that is WAY better than I am”!!! HA!). Jer is a professional graphic designer (by “professional” I mean he gets paid to design stuff) and he’s chosen to pimp Shelfworthy.com, an exclusive startup that helps people share their refined tastes in books, movies, and games (by “exclusive” I mean it’s invite only).

Here’s what I asked Jer:

What comics have you been reading lately? Are you a store every Wednesday guy or just whenever?

And here’s what he had to say:

I consider myself a Wednesday guy for the most part. I have subscriptions and try to go at least once a month to pick ‘em up.

In general, I’ve been cutting back on a bunch of titles that I used to read to just focus on particular writers. I read a lot of titles from Brian K. Vaughan, Brian Bendis, Mark Millar, and Robert Kirkman. And then I’ve been keeping up with some Ed Brubaker, Geoff Johns, and Grant Morrison runs. That pretty much covers most of my Marvel and DC stuff, though there are some other gems in there, such as Captain Britain, Patsy Walker, and Ambush Bug, that I dig.

I’m also a Buffy fan, so I keep up with Season 8 and Angel. I try and read as much indie stuff as possible. I’m a huge AdHouse Books and Oni Press fan. I do read a lot of anthologies like Flight, SPX, and Mome when I have the time.

Now I’m just rambling, haha. But I guess I should just list a few more things: A Top 10 [Editor's note: somebody tell this guy we do Top 9's around here… not 10's!!! – Nick] list of comics I do not miss no matter what (fanboys love lists, don’t they ;)

(In no particular order…)

1. Ultimate Spider-Man
2. Scott Pilgrim (The most recent volume is great. It got me inspired to go back and read all the other volumes again!)
3. Invincible
4. The Umbrella Academy (This was a title that I was really looking forward to before it came out and it totally exceeded my expectations.)
5. Fables + Jack of Fables
6. Buffy Season 8
7. Wonderful World of Oz (Marvel’s refreshing adaptation. I love Skottie Young’s art. I’m a big cartoony art kinda guy, haha!)
8. Green Lantern
9. Ex Machina
10. Runaways (Though it’s been a while, original creators BKV and Adrian Alphona are sorely missed.)

Hmm, that’s all I got off the top of my head!

P.S. Not sure if you keep up with animated shows, but The Spectacular Spider-Man is definitely one of the best comic book cartoons out there. Greg Weisman (of Gargoyles fame) is one of main showrunners and that’s some quality storytelling right there. I also really liked the Wonder Woman animated DVD that came out recently.

Do you have a Profile in Comics Reading you want to share with the world? Shoot me a line at nick@audioshocker.com and I’ll let you know what I think!

AudioShocker Podcast #71 – Chris G on G-Man. Big Stan, Watchmen, Wonder Woman Up Next

Published
by
nick marino
on March 10, 2009
in Interviews and Podcast Episodes
. 1 Comment

Doc Manhattan and his large resting lengthCartoonist Chris Giarrusso talks about G-Man from Image Comics. He also talks about Peanuts, Art Baltazar, Mini Marvels, Team Cannon Fodder, and Star Wars.

Then Justique, Neal, and Nick talk movies, anime, TV, and comics. Neal watched Watchmen. He likey. Especially the large resting length. Justique and Nick watched Big Stan. They likey Rob Schneider. They also watched Wonder Woman. No likey. Also: SNL movies, Hannah Slutana, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical, Jigoku Shoujo a.k.a. Hell Girl, Dollhouse, Disaster Movie, Thanos Quest, Armor Wars, and more.

 
 AudioShocker #71 [52:21m]: Play Now | Download

AudioShocker Podcast #55 – Honey, I Shrunk My Schizoid Embolism

Published
by
nick marino
on November 11, 2008
in Podcast Episodes
. 0 Comments

Joe Johnson is the director of The First Avenger: Captain America, Austin Powers rips off Cap’s story, RocknRolla is evidence that Guy Ritchie hates old people, redbox teaches Nick that Secrets of the Furious Five sucks, Djimon Hounsou will be the voice of the Black Panther, Beyonce wants to play Wonder Woman, President Obama, NealShyam.com, Internet Explorer sucks at displaying .png files, Terra #1 is awesome, Neal knows more about the Teen Titans than Nick, and Vixen: Return of the Lion is all about going to Africa to hunt down Lindsay Lohan (who is now officially bisexual).

 
 AudioShocker #55 [33:42m]: Play Now | Download

AudioShocker Podcast #48 – Phantom of the Awesomecast

Published
by
nick marino
on September 23, 2008
in Podcast Episodes
. 2 Comments

It’s the AudioShocker’s first birthday! To celebrate, the podcast hit the road and recorded live at Phantom of the Attic Comics on Craig Street in Pittsburgh, PA during New Comics Day on Wednesday, September 17. 2008. Joining Neal and Nick are guests Wayne Wise and Scott Hedlund. The crew talks about Dave Sim and Cerebus, Wonder Woman, the aging comic book fanbase, graphic novels vs. mini series, Drunk Duck, Strumhaus, Grey Legacy, and tons more comics topics.

 
 AudioShocker #48 [59:08m]: Play Now | Download

The Top 9 Superhero Vehicles

Published
by
nick marino
on August 29, 2008
in The Top 9
. 2 Comments

9. Fantomex’s E.V.A.

8. Captain America’s Motorcycle

7. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ Turtle Van

6. Avengers’ Quinjet

5. X-Men’s Blackbird

4. Batman’s Batmobile

3. Fantastic Four’s Fantasticar

2. Wonder Woman’s Invisible Plane

1. Silver Surfer’s Board

Next: The Top 9 Comic Book Superpowers!

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

ComicShocker Week 20 2008

Published
by
nick marino
on May 14, 2008
in Comics
. 0 Comments

Wonder Woman #20. I’ve been waiting for this. Aaron Lopresti on THE superheroine. It’s pretty good. Not mind blowing. But decent.

My biggest praises? The art and the character of Etta Candy. My most egregious criticisms? The dialogue that doesn’t flow well (most everything except for Etta) and the seeming disconnect between Wonder Woman’s Beowulf adventure and Diana’s encounter with an unfriendly foe.

On another note, I’m sure it’s been addressed, but Etta Candy is definitely modeled after Wonder Woman writer Gail Simone. At the very least, it’s a physical likeness. I’ve never met Gail so I can’t speak for the personality.

And on a TOTALLY unrelated note, today I just learned that there are approximately 30 free issues of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles vol. 4 on Wowio. I know I’m a little bit late on this but who cares?! We’re talking about free comic books here.

The deal with Wowio is that you have to confirm your location, which can be a bit bizarre. You can do it with a credit card / debit card. You can do it with a non-anonymous email address (whatever the hell that is). Or you can send them a scan of your photo ID.

DAMN! All we want to do is download free books Wowio. Why make it so weird???

ComicShocker Week 11 2008

Published
by
nick marino
on March 17, 2008
in Comics
. 0 Comments

It’s baaack. Reads You Need. This has been a busy week for me, but I want to let you know about a few comics that came out last Wednesday that you should be checking out.

The Last Defenders #1: This exceptional first issue is the best book I read from the whole stack of Wednesday, March 12. Joe Casey and Jim Muniz take the notion of an average, if not troubled, superhero team and reinvent it for the post-Civil War Marvel Universe. It’s almost like a superhero sitcom full of sci-fi, big fights, and quirky characters (with Nighthawk at the center of the storm). The writing takes chances but it still provides solid traditional superhero story elements.

The 99 #6: If you follow my weekly posts on here at all, you probably know how much I love The 99. I even emailed scripter Fabian Nicieza to see if he would like to do an interview on the AudioShocker podcast. He graciously declined due to the fact that Stuart Moore is soon to be the new series writer. Still, this issue by Nicieza is terrific and well worth picking up.

Wonder Woman #18: I tried this series earlier in its relaunch and it just didn’t do it for me. But the combination of Gail Simone and Bernard Chang is stupendous in this issue, and I highly recommend you pick it up. Chang’s art is a fantastic blend of Steve Dillon and Aaron Lopresti, bringing both grace and personality to the page. Simone’s story is solid and fun, promising more great future issues.

On a side note, comic fans should keep their eyes glued to the AudioShocker site tomorrow as we release an interview with Gotham Chopra, the creative director behind the upstart comic book publisher, Virgin Comics. Gotham talks about the difficulties of launching a new comic book publisher. He discusses his experiences working with creative talent such as Nic Cage, John Woo, Jenna Jameson, and many more. And at the end of the episode, Gotham makes an exclusive announcement about the next celebrity soon to work with Virgin Comics.