9. At approximately 2 AM EST on Friday, May 29, 2009, a savagely loud banging noise emanated from my ceiling as my upstairs neighbor decided to start rearranging furniture in the middle of the night. Then, once the banging subsided…
8. An atrocious noise began to filter down as my neighbor then decided to vacuum directly above my bed (and, in turn, my head) for a good 30 minutes. Laying awake and angry about the noise, my thoughts wandered as…
7. I started thinking about how bad I want to read my Iron Man “Armor Wars II” backissues. But I promised myself I’d finish reading A Scanner Darkly before I started reading any new comic books because…
6. I’ve been desperate to finish reading A Scanner Darkly for Pete’s Culturology book club. I vowed to complete it in time for this Monday, despite the fact that I’ve reached the end of a grand total of two prose novels in the past four years. Thus, with the loud sucking noise still persisting…
5. I finished reading A Scanner Darkly and it sucked. And that makes me cranky. You wouldn’t like me when I’m cranky. Disappointed with the novel and still unable to sleep…
4. I found myself busy responding to the AudioShocker Grammar Police on a throw-away post I wrote about zombies. Pleased that Neal stuck up for me, I then decided to peruse some other blog comments when…
3. I became perplexed while trying to figure out why Neal saw Sanchez, of “Dirty Sanchez” fame, as a “sweaty day laborer.” I mean, why couldn’t Sanchez be a wealthy Mexico City businessman or a student at a prestigious university who just happened to like both blow jobs AND anal sex? Recognizing a trend…
2. I became concerned that a lot of people I know like to make comments that perpetuate negative Hispanic stereotypes. And after all this, I see that it’s now 4 AM and I’m still awake because…
1. I’m busy writing this goddamn list.
More: The Top 9 Horror / Psychological Anime – Part One (Remember how I used to split The Top 9 up into two parts? How obnoxious!)
Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.










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