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Yeah, so last week I ran The Top 9 Reasons Why Comics Don’t Need to Be Saved - Part One, which consisted solely of reasons nine thru six. Why? Because I’m a dick.
And now, for your consideration, are the decidedly more irreverent Top 9 Reasons Why Comics Don’t Need to Be Saved reasons five thru one:
5. Newspaper comic strips are dying because fewer and fewer people want to read newspapers, not because they don’t want to read comics. Now they go and read this stuff on the Internet. They’re called “webcomics” and those are doing just fine.
4. Seriously, Hollywood wants to give comic books fellatio right now. In fact, they may have already finished the fellatio and moved onto the hardcore doggiestyle section of “Filmstriptease presents Cramming Comics vol 1.” Soon they’re going to be finishing off vol 1 with a spectacular facial (which could be as soon as Watchmen or as far away as the Avengers movie). It all depends on how long Hollywood can keep it up.
3. Single issues are really a niche product at this point and I don’t think there’s anything that’s going to change that. I’m part of that niche audience and I love the singles, but most people want a bigger chunk of story. If that’s the case, let the singles slowly fade away and bring on the graphic novels because…
2. Graphic novel sales continue to look hopeful. Bookstores are carrying graphic novels by the hoard and putting them up in huge floor displays all the time. I don’t think that would happen if there wasn’t some serious coin to be made. Guys whose names have been on the tip of my tongue for the majority of my natural life are slowly becoming adored literary idols for a new generation of readers. Fuck, I just saw Watchmen sitting on a shelf in Borders in their “Bestsellers” section when I went to buy the Iron Man DVD.
1. Comic book storytelling continues to improve. I see it every week when I read my Wednesday haul of new comics. And at the end of the day, it’s all about good content.
Next: The Top 9 Things That May Have Gone Wrong with Last Defenders - Part One
Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.
The Street Fighter movie, Super Mario Bros movie, Wes Anderson, Outsourced, Iron Man on DVD, Rampaging Hulk magazine, and reviews of new albums by TI, Skillz, and Solange Knowles are how we celebrate the big five-oh. Then, after the end theme, a special update as we learn about Street Fighter - The Legend of Chun Li.
I realize that this post is, maybe, three weeks late to be as topical as it could be, but let’s look all the way back, for a moment, to the month of September and the Coen brother’s most recent film, Burn After Reading. I saw this on its opening weekend and wasn’t disappointed. Wasn’t blown away, but was generally quite entertained by it. I had been nervous leading up to it because of the movie’s trailers, which seemed to be advertising the film as essentially just an ensemble-casted yarn. But this is, in fact, what interests me about the Coen brothers in the first place: they seem to be able to make films with ensemble casts that are not, in fact, ensemble cast movies.
To clarify, by “ensemble cast movie” I mean any variety of film that is recognized, first and foremost, for its breadth of cast before anything else—be it (to keep my points of reference generally contemporary) the not-underrated-but-not-terrible-either Rat Race or the ensemble cast movie for the ages of The Royal Tenenbaums (or the later, terrible, Wes Anderson movies). So how can I separate many of the Coen brother’s star-studded rosters from the category? In a couple of ways:
1) Characters vs. stars-playing-characters. Are the main characters beings unto themselves, or obvious place-holders for the type of character most likely to be played by actor/actress X? With the Coen brother’s being generally well-known for their characters, here is perhaps a key as to why I don’t see their movies as being ensemble-y; for instance (though The Big Lebowski doesn’t necessarily figure into this conversation) Jeff Bridges (one of the great actors of his generation) is so completely The Dude that one forgets he is a star in many other movies as well—if anything, I have trouble forgetting that Jeff Bridges isn’t The Dude in other movies. Ensemble movies, therefore, are more actor-forward, such as Bill Murray playing Bill-Murray-as-a-hack-shrink in Royal Tenebaums, or any number of famous people just stuck into roles just north of cameos to get them on the cast list.
Continue reading ‘Culturology 002 - Shoot Brad Pitt in the Head After Reading’
A bunch of comic book people are like, “OH NO! Comic books are going to die in five years because we’re not kissing the general public in the ass enough! Our business plan is all wrong! Creators are mismanaging their careers! And Superman isn’t accessible to five year olds anymore!!!”
You know what? Shut up. That’s right. I said it. Just shut the fuck up.
Comics aren’t going to “die” and they certainly don’t need to be “saved.” Here are the top 9 reasons why:
9. Comics are a medium of expression rooted in the most basic form of visual storytelling short of acting — a picture and some words. How the hell can you “save” that and how could it ever “die”?
8. If you’re worried about the modern comic book publishing industry dying, well then that’s a whole other thing. But I don’t think it’s going to happen anytime soon when you have some of the world’s most lucrative licensed characters coming out of a long legacy of comic book publishing.
7. While superheroes are bound to fall out of favor in Hollywood in a couple of years, actual interest in physical comics is going up. Trust me, I know. People used to ask me if the movies were anything like the stories. Now they ask me where they can go to buy the comics. Hell, even MTV and the LA Times now have blogs that address comic book news on a daily basis. That’s only going to boost interest.
6. This shit is cyclical. Sales of comics will dip and they will rise. They will do that, over and over, until the day humans no longer view printed media and digital projection screens connected to their information boxes.
At some point in the recent past this column became a two-parter thing. Totally defeats the purpose of a having top 9, right? Well that’s just the kind of mindfuck arseholeness I’m all about so deal with it!!! The final five reasons why comics don’t need to be saved will be here in only seven short days, and I promise they are way more offensive and interesting these these first four reasons.
Next: The Top 9 Reasons Why Comics Don’t Need to Be Saved - Part Two!
Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.
I must admit, I’m a bit nervous about my first post on the Audioshocker. Not that I should be (I did, after all, once upon a time, participate in one of the podcasts), but I am concerned that I am simply neither hip enough nor up-to-date with my pop-radar either. I was initially thinking that I could orient my posts around that very out-of-touchness, but have, at least for the time being decided against that. I will keep up with the world around me, dammit! And, with that in mind, let me get to what I’m getting to for this inaugural post: Ted Nugent.
Though you may not be as enthralled by the phenomenon of The Nuge as I am, you still must admit that he’s something of an anomaly. For all intents and purposes, the man should have been just another one hit wonder, with his one song “Cat Scratch Fever,” but somehow he has maintained a cultural cachet well greater than what writing a single hit song should command. He’s, of course, well known for his ultra-conservative radio show, and hosting his own reality TV series, and appearing on at least one other one. This is, perhaps, not so different a CV as any other flash-in-the-pan success, but bear with me. I am not claiming that The Nuge is hugely famous or wildly successful, merely that he has a greater piece of the pop-cultural pie than one would expect for the scribe of a song about venereal disease.
It was way back last week when I wrote about The Top #9-5 Horror / Psychological Anime… but it feels like only nanoseconds ago! Oh well, time flies when you’re watching anime. Here’s the rest:
4. Paranoia Agent. Satoshi Kon strikes again. This psychological mind fuck had me addicted from the first episode. No more words…go watch this one.
3. Requiem from the Darkness. Scariest anime and above all most disturbing media form I have ever experienced. There is violence from the start and the last few episodes were really horrifying. I’m still in the process of rewatching, slowly inching my way toward what I know will only disgust me, though I’m probably a little numb to the horror by now. Great anime! A must see for both horror and anime fans alike.
2. Higurashi no Naku Koro ni & Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Kai. How could I possibly follow up that last choice…with a delicious little twist called When the Cicadas Cry! It seems like your normal cheesy harem anime, but right from the start you know there’s something wrong. It’s either the foreshadowed murders at the beginning of each arc or the actual conclusion at the end. Watch the first four episodes. If you’re not hooked then turn it off.
1. Doomed Megalopolis. My absolute favorite. Twisted in its own way, I fell in love with the first episode. I won’t offer any spoilers or character peeks or anything like that. Just watch this supernatural thriller and prepare to be haunted.
Next: The Top 9 Reasons Why Comics Don’t Need to Be Saved - Part One!
Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.
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