Problem is, there are significantly less Mini Marvels coming out these days. This concerns me. If you want to read more Mini Marvels comic strips in your monthly comics (or even in digest form), then you should email adventures@marvel.com and tell them. I did.

P.S. While we're on the topic of Mini Marvels, I should mention that Chris G has a new digest out from Image Comics called G-Man: Learning to Fly.

P.P.S. I love you, Elephant Steve.

Then Justique, Neal, and Nick talk movies, anime, TV, and comics. Neal watched Watchmen. He likey. Especially the large resting length. Justique and Nick watched Big Stan. They likey Rob Schneider. They also watched Wonder Woman. No likey. Also: SNL movies, Hannah Slutana, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical, Jigoku Shoujo a.k.a. Hell Girl, Dollhouse, Disaster Movie, Thanos Quest, Armor Wars, and more.

Then Justique, Neal, and Nick talk about Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li, Street Fighter IV, The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian, famous film names re-titled to be porn movies, Jigoku Shoujo anime a.k.a. Hell Girl, the Watchmen movie, Secret Invasion hardcover collection by Bendis and Lenil Yu, and Iron Man: Armor Wars.

Then Nick and Neal chat about Balls Out and the future of raunchy comedy, superhero movies have replaced sci-fi action movies, Domino Harvey is lame even with Keira Knightley, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is decent but overrated. Finally, we end the show with a debate... Monty Python vs. Mel Brooks for the title of Biggest Influence on Modern Gross Out Comedy Movies.

12:00 PM

I emailed Jay Faerber and Chris Giarrusso. Jay and I have been planning to talk about Dynamo 5 as the series approaches its semi-relaunch. I emailed Chris because Wednesday saw the unexpected appearance of Mini Marvels: Secret Invasion on the Diamond Comics shipping list.

Within the next few weeks, you can expect to hear Jay Faerber on our weekly podcast talking about Dynamo 5 #0 and the future of the series. Also expect to hear from Chris G in the coming weeks. We'll be talking about the new Mini Marvel digest, as well as his upcoming G-Man digest from Image Comics.

6:00 PM

I worked my way thru a Pittsburgh mini-blizzard to get to Phantom of the Attic Comics on Craig St. It was Wednesday, after all. And I needed me some new comics. And some old comics too.

Last week I gave my retailer a back issue wish list. At the top? Iron Man #215-232. David Michelinie and Bob Layton join up with penciler Mark Bright to take Tony Stark and Rhodey Rhodes into Armor Wars (and BWS bats cleanup on #232, an Armor Wars epilogue). I was inspired by the reviews on Advanced Iron to grab this whole run.

And there's more. I also snagged Iron Man #285-299, filling in the middle between the landmark War Machine issues of #284 and #300. AND I picked up Marvel Comics Presents #152-155, a four-part War Machine story. Expect to see some of these issues pop up in my 3 Panel Reviews.

New stuff? Black Panther #1, X-Men: The Times and Life of Lucas Bishop #1, X-Men Vs. Hulk, Tales of the TMNT #53, Black Lightning: Year One #1 (for free thanks to a misprint!), and Dynamo 5 #19. My retailers were awesome enough to toss me the variant cover of Black Panther #1 (probably because I'm the most rabid T'Challa fan at the shop!). Sadly, my shop didn't have any copies of Mini Marvels: Secret Invasion... I'm not sure if they didn't order any (which would be odd) or if Diamond didn't actually ship the book (which would NOT be odd).

I made a pretty serious decision about my comic book purchasing habits as well. These $3.99 books are killing me. I decided that stuff like yesterday's Secret Warriors #1 is just gonna have to wait. Stuff like the Bishop mini and Claremont's X-Men Vs. Hulk one-shot are going to take precedence. I'd rather indulge in more unique side projects. Vixen, Terra, Hulk one-shots, MC2 books, and X-Men minis are the sort of intriguing things I want to pick up.

8:00 PM

After sitting on it for a few days, it was time to crack open the Hulk Vs. DVD. First up? Hulk Vs. Wolverine. It's awesome that Jeff Matsuda was the character designer for this half of the Hulk Vs. project. But I need some character exploration too. While the animation was strong and the voice performances were decent, the story of Hulk Vs. Wolverine (which really should have been called Hulk Vs. Weapon X) needed more gripping character development. This just didn't reach the heights of Ultimate Avengers or Next Avengers. Hopefully Hulk Vs. Thor will really knock it out of the park.

9:00 PM

Shh!!! Justique's asleep and I have a whole mammoth stack of Iron Man back issues to read!!!

I slowly snuck over to my new reading regiment and selected Iron Man #215. As I crept back to the couch, Justique opened her eyes! DAMN IT!!! But I didn’t put the issue away. I know my girlfriend well. She was back to sleep within two minutes. Then I cracked open #215 and started to read.

Thursday, February 5, 11:59 AM

9:00 AM

Iron Man #225 and #228. That's what I needed. My shop had EVERYTHING from my wish list save for these two issues. I ended up paying $10 for the two of them online, which kind of sucks. But considering I only paid $1 per issue for the entire Armor Wars run, I'm already well ahead of the curve.

11:00 AM

I want to see this Push movie. Chris Evans was great as Johnny Storm. Plus, Push is a super powered action flick… so much so that a few movie reviewers actually think this film is based on comics... like this guy from the Orlando Sentinel.

But the movie could go either way. It sounds reminiscent of last year's Jumper, which sucked. My movie theater has Push projected digitally, which Fandango describes as having "impressive clarity, brilliance and color and a lack of scratches, fading and flutter."

Not sure if I'm buying it, Fandango. I mean, can it really be that much better than regular projection? Isn't it awesome enough that movies get projected 50 times bigger than the screen on my crappy TV set?

DARK HORSE COMICS

DOMO SCULPTED MAGNET

Nick: Alright! We're getting started early this week. What a goofy title, even for a statue / magnet (if that's what this thing even is). Excellent.

FRAZETTA EGYPTIAN QUEEN STATUE
JOURNAL TOKIDOKI KAITEN SUSHI
JUDGE DREDD DREDD VS DEATH STATUE
JUDGE DREDD DREDD VS DEATH STATUE

Nick: Hmmmm... you got me on this one. They cost the same. They have the same name. What's the difference?

Neal: I seriously hope Judge Death is in this issue [Editors Note- I think Neal means statue, not issue. - Nick]. That dude is brutal.

PIGEONS FROM HELL #4 (OF 4)

Neal: More Hellfoul!

ROBOTS & DONUTS TP

Nick: I hope there's a second volume of this title with the name "A.F. - ARTIFICIAL FLAVORING"

STAR WARS REBELLION #15 VECTOR PART 7 (OF 12)
STYLE SCHOOL TP VOL 02

Neal: Christian Siriano got a comic book?

UNCLE CREEPY STATUE

Nick: The eternal creepy uncle, now in statue form. Keep this around the house if you have trouble remembering to wear clothes (or if you just like the security of knowing that somehow, somewhere somebody's creepy uncle is creeping them out right NOW).

Neal: This is great.

WORKSHOP OF FILTHY CREATION ART OF JOHNNY ACE & KALI VERRA

Neal: Next week - Family Room of Immaculate Conception

DC COMICS

AME COMI CHEETAH VINYL FIGURE
AME COMI WONDER WOMAN VINYL FIGURE

Nick: Is Vinyl Wonder Woman a hip hop hero or a pleather fetish figure?

BATMAN #677 RIP 2ND PTG
BATMAN DEATH MASK #4 (OF 4)
BATMAN GOING SANE TP

Nick: They named this book after the feeling I had when I realized that there was at least one other person out there who thought The Dark Knight smelled like New York City on a hot summer's trash collection day.

BLUE BEETLE #29
CARTOON NETWORK BLOCK PARTY #47
CATWOMAN #81
DC SPECIAL CYBORG #3 (OF 5)
DOOM PATROL ARCHIVES HC VOL 05
GREEN LANTERN #33

Nick: In this issue, Rainbow Brite and the Color Brigade team-up with Hal Jordan to fight the evil forces of fading laundry.

HUNTRESS YEAR ONE #6 (OF 6)
JOKERS ASYLUM TWO FACE #1

Nick: Another oddly timed Two-Face comic. Should have been out before the flick!

JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA ANNUAL #1
NEW DYNAMIX #5 (OF 5)
NORTHLANDERS #8
REIGN IN HELL #1 (OF 8)

Neal: Next Week - Snow in Purgatory

SUPERMAN BATMAN #50

Nick: I would like this series better if it was called "DC TWO-IN-ONE" -- then it would actually make sense for Wonder Woman to show up in every issue.

TEEN TITANS #61
TRINITY #9
UN-MEN #12
WILDCATS #1

Nick: Whoa! Wasn't this supposed to come out a year ago?

Neal: Is this about Freaky Cougar-MILFs?

IMAGE COMICS

DARKNESS #3 NYCC EXCL VAR
DYNAMO 5 #15
ELEPHANTMEN TP VOL 01 WOUNDED ANIMALS
FRANK FRAZETTAS CREATURES #1
PILOT SEASON THE CORE #1

Nick: The Pilot Season books just keep getting better. If all goes to plan, we'll have a Pilot Season interview episode of the podcast for you in a few weeks.

POPGUN GN VOL 02

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN EXTRA
BLACK PANTHER #39

Nick: Two issues of Black Panther in two weeks?! AWESOME!!!

CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI 13 #1 3RD PTG HITCH SKETCH VAR
CAPTAIN MARVEL PREM HC SECRET INVASION
ESSENTIAL FANTASTIC FOUR TP VOL 7
FANTASTIC FOUR TRUE STORY #1 (OF 4)

Nick: This issue better not feature Mole Man getting lobotomized by Dr. Strange because he raped Sue Storm when Reed was out of the lab getting a sandwich. Elongated Ma- err, I mean, Mr. Fantastic already has enough problems as it is.

GUARDIANS OF GALAXY MUST HAVE
HAUNT OF HORROR LOVECRAFT #2 (OF 3)
HULK #4 2ND PTG MCGUINNESS WRAPAROUND VAR
MARVEL SPOTLIGHT UNCANNY X-MEN 500 ISSUES
MMW DEFENDERS HC VOL 01
MMW DEFENDERS HC VOL 01 VAR ED 100
MS MARVEL #29
NEWUNIVERSAL 1959
NOVA TP VOL 02 KNOWHERE

Neal: Yeah... Northern Virginia can really seem like an intellectual wasteland sometimes.

ORDER TP VOL 02 CALIFORNIA DREAMING
SECRET INVASION FANTASTIC FOUR #3 (OF 3) SI
SECRET INVASION WHO DO YOU TRUST 2ND PTG JIMENEZ VAR
SILVER SURFER TP REQUIEM
SKAAR SON OF HULK #2

Nick: Green Conan is back at it again.

SKRULLS VS POWER PACK #1 (OF 4)
SPIDER-MAN WITH GREAT POWER #5 (OF 5)
THOR #10
THOR BY J MICHAEL STRACZYNSKI TP VOL 01
TRUE BELIEVERS #1 (OF 5)
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #124
WOLVERINE #67

Nick: I'm also super pumped for this. The first issue of "Old Man Logan" was solid.

WOLVERINE #67 MCNIVEN SKETCH VAR
WOLVERINE ORIGINS #27

Neal: Have you seen the trailer yet?

X-MEN FIRST CLASS VOL 2 #14
X-MEN ODD MEN OUT

COMICS

1001 ARABIAN NIGHTS ADVENTURES OF SINBAD #2
AGE OF INSECTS VOL 03 NOT HUMAN
AIR GEAR GN VOL 09

Nick: On a completely unrelated note, how awesome would it be if Disney published an Air Bud mature readers comic? Air Bud in the seedy world of deadly dog fighting. Air Bud gets into high stakes illegal sports gambling. Air Bud as the guard dog / bouncer at a glory hole peep show club. You see where I'm going with this.

ARCHIE DIGEST #246
BABYSITTER GN
BAYBA DOMINA IN RED GN
BAYBA THE 110 BJS GN
BEAR STORIES GN VOL 01
BEYOND WONDERLAND #1 (OF 6)
BOOKHUNTER GN
CALIBER #1 (OF 5) 2ND PTG A CVR ARTGERM
CALIBER #1 (OF 5) 2ND PTG B CVR ARTGERM
CALIBER #1 (OF 5) 2ND PTG C CVR WILKINS
CALIBER #4 (OF 5) A CVR ROYO
CALIBER #4 (OF 5) B CVR RAMBAUD
CHAIR GN

Nick: Ah, plain and simple. A comic book about a chair. I like this "back-to-basics" approach.

CHOPPER ZOMBIE GN

Nick: Ah, plain and simple. A comic book about a pissed-off zombie riding a chopper motorcycle around and looking for brains to eat. I like this "back-to-basics" approach.

CLASH TP
COMIC BOOK COMICS #2
COMPLETELY MAD DON MARTIN HC
CONTRACT #1 (OF 3)

Nick: A non-fiction release about the blog backlash following the TokyoPop Manga Pilots contact controversy. That's right -- it's enough for three issues.

DEADWORLD FROZEN OVER #3 (OF 4)
DRAGONLANCE LEGENDS TIME OF THE TWINS #1 (OF 3) MOYANO CVR A
DRAGONLANCE LEGENDS TIME OF THE TWINS #1 (OF 3) WALPOLE CVR
DREADNOUGHT INVASION SIX #4 (OF 4)
DREAM MAIDEN MEGAN GN
DUMMYS GUIDE TO DANGER LOST AT SEA #4 (OF 4)
FALL OF CTHULHU TP VOL 02 GATHERING
FEMME NOIR DARK CITY DIARIES #2 (OF 4) HALEY CVR B
FEMME NOIR DARK CITY DIARIES #2 (OF 4) STATON & LOPEZ CVR A
FEVERISH GN
FICTION CLEMENS #3 (OF 3)
FORGOTTEN REALMS TP VOL 07 THE LEGACY
GHOST WHISPERER #5

Nick: Ever see that movie the Horse Whisperer? That was one of those movies that made me want my money back the second it finished. I don't even think that I paid to see it, and I still wanted some money for sitting through the damn thing.

GIRL GENIUS HC VOL 07 AGATHA & VOICE O/T CASTLE
GRIMM FAIRY TALES #29

Neal: This book kind of sucks.

GRIMM FAIRY TALES OVERSIZED HC
HALLOWEEN NIGHTDANCE TP VOL 01
HERCULES #1 (OF 5) 2ND PTG A CVR STERANKO
HERCULES #1 (OF 5) 2ND PTG B CVR ADMIRA SUNNY
HERCULES #4 (OF 5) A CVR SEJIC
HERCULES #4 (OF 5) B CVR MONG
HOTEL AFRICA GN VOL 02 (OF 4)
JADE OF BANGO GN VOL 01 (OF 7)

Nick: I hope this is a porno comic because, if it is, it's definitely the best title this week.

JIM BUTCHERS DRESDEN FILES #4 (OF 4) WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE
JOURNEY TP VOL 01
JUGHEAD #190
KNIGHTS GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE #141
KOLCHAK THE NIGHT STALKER SOUND OF FEAR TP
KUJIBIKI UNBALANCE GN VOL 01
LITTLE NEMO IN SLUMBERLAND HC MANY MORE SPLENDID
LITTLE NEMO IN SLUMBERLAND VOL 02 LTD ED HC
LOCKE & KEY #6

Nick: I envisioned some sort of locksmith joke about this book, saying how in this issue the locksmith finally shows up to let the protagonist into their apartment. Then I would say something like "That's right, they called the locksmith six months ago in #1 and now they're finally going to get inside!"

MAN WITH NO NAME #3
ME & THE DEVIL BLUES GN VOL 01 UNREAL LIFE ROBERT JOHNSON
MUMBAI MACGUFFIN ONE SHOT
MUMMY MOVIE PREQUEL RISE & FALL OF XANGOS AX #4
NARCOPOLIS #4 (OF 4)
NARCOPOLIS #4 (OF 4) WRAP CVR

Neal: The classic lyric poem of ancient Greek DEA agents - updated as a graphic novel.

NEVERLAND GN
NEW BATTLESTAR GALACTICA SEASON ZERO #11
NIGHT O/T LIVING DEAD ANNUAL #1 GOLD FOIL CVR

Nick: Have any of these zombie comics ever featured a zombie unicorn? That would be awesome.

PARASYTE GN VOL 04 (OF 8)
PATH TP VOL 03 DEATH & DISHONOR
PATHOS GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
PIRATES VS NINJAS DEBATE IN 08 ONE-SHOT

Nick: Obviously a 2008 election tie-in book. McCain and Obama -- who's the pirate and who's the ninja?

PROJECT SUPERPOWERS #5 (OF 7)
RED SONJA ADRIAN FOIL CVR #35
SABBATH ALL YOUR SINS REBORN TP VOL 01 THE COLLECTED POGROM
SADHU WHEEL OF DESTINY #3 (OF 4)
SERPO GN
SHIKI TSUKAI GN VOL 03
SOLA GN VOL 01
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG ARCHIVES TP VOL 08
STAR TREK MIRROR IMAGES #2
STAR TREK YEAR FOUR ENTERPRISE EXPERIMENT #4
STEAL MOON GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
SUPERNATURAL LAW #45
TALES FROM THE CRYPT #7

Neal: Did I ever tell you guys about the "Cryptkeeper" and New Years Eve 2007?

TAROT WITCH OF THE BLACK ROSE #51
TEAM 14 ALTINER CVR A (ONE SHOT)
TEAM 14 BASALDUA CVR B (ONE SHOT)
TEMPLAR ARIZONA GN VOL 02 MOB GOES WILD

Nick: Imagine an angry mob chasing down Frankenstein with torches and pitchforks while they take their tops off to get some beads and pose for five seconds of video that can later be blurred out and shown at 2AM in the morning on network television as a cheesy infomercial. That's "MOB GOES WILD."

TOTO GN VOL 02
VAMPIRELLA QUARTERLY SPRING 2008 SALONGA LTD ED
VAMPIRELLA QUARTERLY SUPERSTAR COLLECTION SET
WALLFLOWER GN VOL 16
WHITE RAPIDS GN
WILD STARS TP VOL 01 BOOK OF CIRCLES
WILD STARS VOL 03 #1-7 SET
ZOMBIE TALES #3 CVR A
ZOMBIE TALES #3 CVR B

My dream began in New York City. I was at some sort of art gallery show. I was there with a large portfolio (full of what, I don't know). It was obviously a comic book themed show or I don't think I would have been there. I met a few professionals and then I left early.

Soon after, I'm back at some country house where I'm staying for one more night until I head back to work the next day in Pittsburgh. I get a phone call. It's a higher-up from Image Comics. They're currently interviewing candidates to become the next Image Comics partner.

We went through a long list of questions detailing the fact that I have never published any comics (nor finished any self-produced ones). The interviewer was fascinated. He loved the notion of a raw, untested amateur becoming an Image partner. He found it compelling that I held down a day job and simply wished I were making comic books on the side.

The phone call was great. He basically left it open-ended, but essentially he told me that I had the job. Little did I know that even if that opportunity didn't pan out, another was about to rear its awesome head...

I'm in the dank country house and I spy someone sleeping on a sofa at the other end of the first floor. I recognize him as an assistant editor from Marvel Comics (right, because I know what a lot of them look like). I bide my time, not bothering him until he comes my way. We say hi, but not too much beyond that.

Now I don't know how I managed to be staying at the same dumpy friend's house as this Marvel editor, but that's irrelevant. This is a dream. And thus, as in a dream, it wasn't long before things got more intense.

Soon a couple of hot female Marvel assistant editors were over too, drinking beers with the editor from the sofa. One of the ladies announced herself as Molly Lazer (the only female Marvel editor I know off the top of my head) and she was quite outgoing. The party saw more and more young Marvel staffers arrive until it was like a college house party. And of course, I partied too.

We all became fast friends. I told them about the Image Comics thing and they congratulated me. Then they told me about how awesome their jobs are. Still, Molly and a few others were leaving Marvel Comics for other ventures (which is actually true here in the real world). Suffice to say that they thought I would be great as a replacement.

The party got so wild that I blacked out at one point (which has also been an unfortunate truth here in the real world from time to time). When I awoke the next morning, I was in full morning-after-the-party mode. I had seemingly hooked up with someone the night before, and I had partied hard into the early morning hours. They told me stories about pouring shaving cream onto my own head and telling a joke about my nipples.

Ahhh, only in dreams could a mid-20s slacker with no comics work under his belt become an Image Comics partner and a Marvel Comics assistant editor all within the same day. It was a ridiculous dream, but it was a great dream.

DARK HORSE COMICS

BERSERK TP VOL 24
LANKHMAR BOOK 06 SWORDS & ICE MAGIC

Nick: This would be a far more exciting title if it was "LANKHMAR BOOK 06 SWORDS & MAGIC ON ICE" -- don't you agree that a comic book about an ice show is far more interesting than a comic about ice magic?

SCRAMBLED INK HC

Nick: I've never tried anything made with octopus ink (I know they make black pasta with it), but this title definitely made me imagine scrambled eggs all grayish-yellow with the ink of octopi mixed in. Mmm mmm... tastes gooooood.

STAR WARS KNIGHTS OF OLD REPUBLIC #31 TURNABOUT
STAR WARS LEGACY #26

Nick: This month in Dark Horse's non-fiction Star Wars series: Fans cringe as George Lucas continues to milk the prequel concept as he releases Star Wars episode 2.5 as an animated film. When will the madness stop?!

USAGI YOJIMBO #113

DC COMICS

AMBUSH BUG YEAR NONE #1 (OF 6)
ARMY @ LOVE TP VOL 02 GENERATION PWNED
AUTHORITY PRIME TP
BATMAN #676 RIP 3RD PTG
BATMAN GOTHAM AFTER MIDNITE #3 (OF 12)

Nick: Detective Comics Comics' epic miniseries about Batman's plunge into the Gotham City disco scene of the 1970s continues.

BRAVE AND THE BOLD #15
COUNTDOWN TO ADVENTURE TP

Nick: You know what this title says to me? "The adventure isn't here yet... we're almost there... just wait until we finish the countdown."

DIANA PRINCE WONDER WOMAN TP VOL 02
DMZ #33
ELSEWORLDS RED SON BOX SET
EXTERMINATORS #30
GON VOL 05
GREEN ARROW BLACK CANARY ROAD TO THE ALTAR TP

Nick: Anyone ever see that movie The Gay Zorro? I think it would be excellent if DC Comics published a mini called The Gay Arrow about Oliver Queen having to go on an undercover mission for a month, so his long-lost gay brother covers for him and takes on the mantle of Green Arrow for a couple weeks. Ollie is so hyper-hetero that just about everyone would notice.

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #26
JOKERS ASYLUM SCARECROW #1
JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #23
KIICHI AND THE MAGIC BOOKS VOL 02
LEGION OF SUPER HEROES #44
MAD MAGAZINE #492
MADAME XANADU #2
NUMBER OF THE BEAST #8 (OF 8)

Nick: 1-800-666-EVIL

ROBIN #175 RIP
SCOOBY DOO #134
SECRET HISTORY THE AUTHORITY HAWKSMOOR #5 (OF 6)
SEVEN SOLDIERS OF VICTORY ARCHIVES HC VOL 03
SPIRIT #19
SUPER FRIENDS #5

Nick: I think I would be more interested in this comic book if it featured old stills from the Super Friends TV show rewritten with inappropriate dialogue. HEY! That gives me an idea...

SUPERMAN #678
SUPERNATURAL RISING SON #4 (OF 6)
TRINITY #8
TWO FACE YEAR ONE #1 (OF 2)

Nick: Grrrreat idea, DC. Put out a Two-Face Year One right after the movie comes out where the character dies. Ooooops, I forgot a SPOILER ALERT. My bad.

X-FILES SPECIAL #0

IMAGE COMICS

ALETHEIA #3 (OF 3)
AMERICAN FLAGG DEFINITIVE COLL HC 1 01
AMERICAN FLAGG DEFINITIVE COLL SGN HC VOL 01

Nick: OMG! I remember when this was first solicited four years ago! It's actually the only issue of Previews I've ever picked up. I can't believe that it actually came out. This should be published by DC Comics in the All-Star line.

ART OF WITCHBLADE
BROKEN TRINITY #1 ROSS CVR B
BROKEN TRINITY #1 SEJIC CVR A

Nick: HAHAHAHA! Great title. If only this was a satire / parody of DC Comics' Trinity...

COMIC BOOK TATTOO HC
COMIC BOOK TATTOO HC LTD ED
COMIC BOOK TATTOO SC

Nick: I've been thinking about getting one of these. It's a tough choice though. The X-Men logo is sweet, don't get me wrong, but a bit droll. I like the Avengers "A" in a circle with the arrow. I'm also partial to the screaming panther from Black Panther (look inside the Jack Kirby vol 1 TPB to see what I mean).

DEAD SPACE #5 (OF 6)
ELEPHANTMEN #13
IMAGE MONSTER PILE UP #1

Nick: Another title this week that could seriously deliver with a slight change and/or addition. May I suggest: "IMAGE MONSTER TRUCK PILE UP #1"

INVINCIBLE #51
LIBERTY COMICS A CBLDF BENEFIT BOOK (ONE SHOT)
MADMAN ATOMIC COMICS TP VOL 01
NOCTURNALS CARNIVAL OF BEASTS (ONE SHOT)
PROOF #10
SCUD THE DISPOSABLE ASSASSIN THE WHOLE SHEBANG HC
SCUD THE DISPOSABLE ASSASSIN THE WHOLE SHEBANG TP

Nick: Anyone else getting a Ricky Martin vibe from this title?

Neal: The rough and tumble life of a down and out young ICBM.

WAR HEROES #1
YOUNGBLOOD #4

MARVEL COMICS

ANGEL REVELATIONS #3 (OF 5)
ANITA BLAKE VH GUILTY PLEASURES HC VOL 02
ASTONISHING X-MEN #25 BERMEJO VAR
AVENGERS INITIATIVE #15 SI

Nick: Love this book! Can't wait for this issue! 3-D Man was awesome in #14. Strawberries and pickles, super fans.

AVENGERS INVADERS #1 DIRECTORS CUT
BLACK PANTHER #38

Nick: Is this the Jason Aaron issue? No, I think we have one more to go. I have to say that for how bad this arc started off, it has really turned itself around. It's pretty damn good, actually.

DAREDEVIL #109
HALO UPRISING MUST HAVE

Nick: You know, I'm actually thinking about getting this. Seriously. Hey, why are you laughing?

IMMORTAL IRON FIST #17
IMMORTAL IRON FIST #17 AJA VAR
IMMORTAL IRON FIST #17 DRAGON LOGO VAR
INCREDIBLE HERCULES #118 2ND PTG SANDOVAL VAR
KITTY PRYDE AND WOLVERINE PREM HC
KITTY PRYDE AND WOLVERINE PREM HC DM ED
MARVEL ADVENTURES FANTASTIC FOUR #38
MARVEL ADVENTURES FANTASTIC FOUR VOL 09 DIGEST
MARVEL ADVENTURES SUPER HEROES #1

Nick: I'm truly looking forward to this issue. The FCBD preview issue was excellent.

MARVEL COMICS PRESENTS #11
MINI MARVELS TP VOL 01 ROCK PAPER SCISSORS DIGEST

Nick: If only this was full of new Mini Marvels material, I would SOOOO be all over this.

MMW GOLDEN AGE CAPTAIN AMERICA HC VOL 02
MMW GOLDEN AGE CAPTAIN AMERICA HC VOL 02 VAR ED 99
NEW AVENGERS #43 SI
NEW WARRIORS #14 SI
SHE-HULK 2 #31 SI
SKRULLS ONE-SHOT SI
THUNDERBOLTS #122 SI

Nick: Anyone noticing a theme here with Marvel's books this week? I can't quite put my finger on it, but for some reason I'm thinking it has something to do with a hush-hush infiltration...

ULTIMATE X-MEN #96
UNCANNY X-MEN #500 DODSON SKETCH VAR
UNCANNY X-MEN #500 DODSON VAR
UNCANNY X-MEN #500 MD
UNCANNY X-MEN #500 TURNER SKETCH VAR
UNCANNY X-MEN #500 TURNER VAR

Nick: Sadly, no one responded to my AudioShocker offer to have an Uncanny X-Men #500 release party. LAME!

UNCANNY X-MEN 500 ISSUES POSTERBOOK
UNCANNY X-MEN GREG LAND PANORAMA POSTER
WOLVERINE #66 2ND PTG MCNIVEN VAR
WOLVERINE FIRST CLASS #5
X-MEN LEGACY #214

Nick: I LOOOOVE this series. Wow. All my favorite MU books are out on the same day: Legacy, BP, and ATI. Damn.

X-MEN TP ENDANGERED SPECIES

COMICS

2000 AD #1593
2000 AD #1594
A G SUPER EROTIC ANTHOLOGY #85

Nick: Now we're talking. How come my comic shop never carries these titles?

ALDEBARAN TP VOL 01 CATASTROPHE
ANNA MERCURY #1 (OF 5) NYCC ED
ANNA MERCURY #2 (OF 5) AUXILIARY ED
AP HOW TO DRAW MANGA PKT MANGA TP VOL 01
APOCALIPSTIX VOL 1 GN

Neal: Demon cosmetics. There will be lots of images of bleeding whales.

ARCHIE #587
AVALON WEB OF MAGIC NOVEL VOL 04 SECRET O/T UNICORN

Nick: Totally awesome title. I'm not gonna lie. I wanna know the secret of the unicorn. Don't you?

BATTLESTAR GALACTICA ORIGINS #8
BEST OF THE WEST #68
BETTY & VERONICA DIGEST #186

Nick: This title is so suspenseful! What are they digesting? I have to know!

BETTY & VERONICA SPECTACULAR #84
BLACK SUMMER #7
BLACK SUMMER #7 WRAP CVR
BLACK SUMMER #7 ZOMBIES CVR
BLOOD BOWL #2 (OF 5) KILLER CONTRACT CVR A
BLOOD BOWL #2 (OF 5) KILLER CONTRACT CVR B

Neal: God damn it. When did Games Workshop totally sell out?

BOY WHO MADE SILENCE #5

Nick: The epic irritable bowl syndrome (IBS) indie comic continues.

Neal: Obviously about a kid with killer gas.

BRAINFAG FOREVER GN

Neal: Must. Resist. Jokes.

CAPTAIN ACTION FIRST MISSION LAST DAY ONE SHOT

Nick: Your oxymoron for the week. Not as oxymoronic as usual, though.

CHERRY COLL VOL 3 TP
COMPLETE BADGER TP VOL 03
COMPLETE METAL GEAR SOLID SONS OF LIBERTY HC
COMPLETE METAL GEAR SOLID SONS OF LIBERTY TP
COMPLETE POPBOT TP

Nick: Again, I'm sensing some sort of theme this week. It's subtle, but I think it has something to do with totality...

DAN DARE #7 (OF 7)
DEVICE SC VOL 01
DF WOLVERINE #66 EX ALT SGN CVR
DOKTOR SLEEPLESS #6 MAD SCIENCE ED
DRAGONLANCE TP VOL 04 DRAGONS SPRING DAWNING 2
DYING OF THIRST HC
FALL OF CTHULHU #14 CVR A
FALL OF CTHULHU #14 CVR B
FALLEN ANGEL IDW #28
FLIGHT GN VOL 05
FORGOTTEN REALMS DARK ELF TRILOGY TP VOL 01 HOMELAND

Nick: Man, even elves have to put up with Homeland Security scare tactics too? It's truly a sad time for our fantasy friends.

FUTURAMA COMICS #38
GEARZ #1
GIRL GENIUS TP VOL 07 AGATHA & VOICE O/T CASTLE

Neal: This comic book is actually kind of cool. Check it out online.

GLAMOURPUSS #2
GOLD DIGGER #98
GOLD DIGGER SOURCEBOOK #19
GOLD DIGGER TIFFANY & CHARLOTTE #2 (OF 4)
GRAVEL #0 CON ED
GRAVEL #1 WIZARD WORLD LA ED
GRAVEL #2 AUXILIARY ED
GRAVEL #3
GRAVEL #3 WRAP CVR
GRIMM FAIRY TALES PIPER #4 (OF 4)
GRIMM FAIRY TALES SPECIAL PHOTO COVER COLL ED #2
HACK SLASH ANNUAL SUICIDE GIRLS CARDSTOCK CVR
HACK SLASH ANNUAL SUICIDE GIRLS REG CVR
HOVERBOY ONE SHOT
HOW TO LOVE HC
INSANE JANE #4 (OF 4)
JUGHEADS DOUBLE DIGEST #142

Nick: Yet again, I have to know what's passing through this guy's intestines. This title is such a tease!

KORGI GN VOL 02 COSMIC COLLECTOR
LAND OF OZ MANGA #1 (OF 8) REG CVR
LAND OF OZ MANGA #1 (OF 8) WRAP CVR

Nick: Oooo, interesting. I'm trying real hard to find manga I like. This looks tempting.

LUCKY LUKE TP VOL 11 WESTERN CIRCUS
MAINTENANCE TP VOL 03
MERCENARIES TP VOL 01
NEGATIVE BURN #21
N-GUARD #1
NHS SHIDOSHI PKT MANGA TP VOL 03
NIGHT & FOG #2 (OF 4)
OUR GANG SC VOL 03
PASTEL GN VOL 11
PISTOLFIST #1 (OF 4)

Nick: Making a pistolfist is an excellent way to shoot a rubber band at someone. Go on, give it a try.

Neal: Is this like the Gunblade and the other assorted weapons that Squaresoft comes up with? Lame.

PROJECT KALKI #3 (OF 4)
RAY HARRYHAUSEN FLYING SAUCERS VS EARTH #3 (OF 4)
RAY HARRYHAUSEN PRESENTS BACK MYSTERIOUS ISLE #1
RED SONJA TP VOL 04
RETURN OF THE SUPER PIMPS #5 (OF 6)

Nick: WHAT?! How did I miss four issues of this series already?

Neal: "Super-Bitch, you best have my Kryptonite!"

ROD ESPINOSA PRINCE OF HEROES TP CHAPTER 01
SCARLETTS CURSE TP
SCHOOL RUMBLE GN VOL 10
SCOUT TP VOL 02
SHMOBOTS TP

Nick: HA! Good title.

SIMPSONS CLASSICS #17
SNAKEPIT TP VOL 02 MY LIFE IN A JUGULAR VEIN
SNAKEPIT TP VOL 03 2007
SONIC X #35
SPARKS #2 (OF 8)

Neal: Does this come with a free sample? Sparks totally turns you into a pirate.

SPOOKS TP VOL 01
STAR TREK NEW FRONTIER #5
STARSHIP TROOPERS #9
STRANDED TP VOL 01

Nick: The tragic story of my brain as I sat in the movie theater and watched The Dark Knight.

STRAW MEN #1 (OF 12)
STREETS OF GLORY #1-5 BAG SET
TALES OF TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES #48

Nick: Ahh, yes. My favorite series returns for its second July issue.

TERMINATOR INFINITY TP VOL 01
TETRAGRAMMATON GN VOL 03 LABYRINTH
THICKER THAN BLOOD #2 (OF 3)
THIRTEEN STEPS TP VOL 01
TRAGIC TALE OF TURKEY BOY AN AMERICAN LOVE STORY GN

Nick: Let me take a stab at the tragic ending: Turkey Boy gets eaten.

TREASURY VICTORIAN MURDER SC VOL 07
TSUBASA GN VOL 18
WARHAMMER 40K EXTERMINATUS #1 (OF 5) CVR A
WARHAMMER 40K EXTERMINATUS #1 (OF 5) CVR B
WARHAMMER CONDEMNED BY FIRE #3 (OF 5) CVR A
WARHAMMER CONDEMNED BY FIRE #3 (OF 5) CVR B
WASTELAND #19

Nick: This issue's story takes place in the near future... exactly one week from now in San Diego, CA.

Neal: No, this book chronicles my life in Peoria.

WORLD WAR ROBOT TP
WORLDS OF HP LOVECRAFT TP VOL 01
YAM TP

DARK HORSE COMICS

CONAN THE CIMMERIAN #1

Nick: On a serious note, this is fantastic timing by Dark Horse. The new Conan movie teaser poster was just released (presumably due to some sort of secret promotion / announcement at SDCC next week) and now there's a brand new Conan #1 on the stands. Nothing funny here -- just good business.

GHOST TALKERS DAYDREAM TP VOL 01
HELM #1 (OF 4)

DC COMICS

ASTRO CITY THE DARK AGE HC BOOK 01
BATGIRL #1 (OF 6)
BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS #9
BATMAN BLACK AND WHITE STATUE NEAL ADAMS
BATMAN FACES NEW ED TP

Nick: I'm not sure who this "New Ed" character is but I hope he's a formidable foe for Batman...

BIRDS OF PREY #120
CARTOON NETWORK ACTION PACK #27

Nick: Misprint by Diamond. Should read: "CARTOON NETWORK SIX-PACK #27"

CASEY BLUE BEYOND TOMORROW #3 (OF 6)
CHECKMATE #28
COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS TP VOL 02
DARK KNIGHT BATMAN STATUE
DARK KNIGHT THE JOKER STATUE
DC WILDSTORM DREAMWAR #4 (OF 6)
DOROTHEA VOL 02
FINAL CRISIS ROGUES REVENGE #1 (OF 3)
FLASH #242
HELLBLAZER #246
I HATE YOU MORE THAN ANYONE VOL 05

Nick: Volume five of my epic autobiography has arrived.

JOKERS ASYLUM POISON IVY #1
SCALPED #19

Nick: Nineteen issues deep and I still can't believe that Head & Shoulders has a licensed series published by DC Comics.

SHOWCASE PRESENTS HAWKMAN TP VOL 02
SIMON DARK #10
SUPERMAN AND THE LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES HC
TANGENT SUPERMANS REIGN #5 (OF 12)
TEARS OF A LAMB VOL 03

Nick: You may be a bit confused by the title of this book because the first two volumes were titled "TEARS OF A CLOWN." However, if you remember, the clown was killed off at the end of volume two after he got raped by Dr. Light. Ahh DCU continuity, I love you.

TINY TITANS #6
TRIALS OF SHAZAM TP VOL 02
TRINITY #7
WORLD OF WARCRAFT #9

IMAGE COMICS

BOMB QUEEN V #3 (OF 6)
CHARLATAN BALL #2
ELEPHANTMEN WAR TOYS TP VOL 01 NO SURRENDER

Nick: The Bush Administration makes their triumphant first appearance in an Image Comic. Now I'm not quite sure why they're called "ELEPHANTMEN" (I'll let your imagination fill in the blanks).

FRANK FRAZETTAS SWAMP DEMON (ONE SHOT)

Nick: I'm glad to see that Image Comics' new line of fine liquors is launching with Frazetta's infamous homebrew hooch recipe. It's only one shot, so you won't get drunk. But it still might get you buzzed with a name like "SWAMP DEMON."

GODLAND #24
MICE TEMPLAR #5
PERHAPANAUTS #3
SCREAMLAND #5 (OF 5)
UNEARTHED CEMETERY BLUES TP VOL 01

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #566
CAPTAIN AMERICA #40
CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI 13 #2 2ND PTG KIRK VAR
FOOLKILLER WHITE ANGELS #1 (OF 5)
GHOST RIDER #25
HOWARD THE DUCK OMNIBUS
HOWARD THE DUCK OMNIBUS DM ED

Nick: I would kill for a forward written by George Lucas.

HULK WWH TP WARBOUND
INCREDIBLE HERCULES #119 SI
IRON MAN DIRECTOR OF SHIELD #31
KICK ASS #3 2ND PTG JRJR VAR

Nick: Misprint by Diamond. Should read: "KICK ASS #3 2ND PTG JAR JAR BINKS VAR"

MARVEL 1985 #3 (OF 6)
MARVEL ADVENTURES AVENGERS #26

Nick: My "haven't read it yet but it should be good" pick of the week.

MARVEL ADVENTURES TWO-IN-ONE #13

Nick: This month in TWO-IN-ONE: Following on the red-hot heels of Last Defenders #5, Nighthawk and Iron Man in She-Hulk.

MARVEL ILLUSTRATED ILIAD #8 (OF 8)
MIGHTY AVENGERS #16 SI
MOON KNIGHT #20
MOON KNIGHT #20 DEODATO SKETCH VAR

Nick: Emuir Deodato musical variant issue. When you flip open the cover, it starts playing an acid jazz version of "Rhapsody in Blue." (If you get this joke, leave a comment. I expect no comments.)

OMEGA UNKNOWN #10 (OF 10)
PUNISHER #59
PUNISHER WAR JOURNAL TP VOL 03 HUNTER HUNTED
SKAAR SON OF HULK #1 2ND PTG GARNEY VAR
SKAAR SON OF HULK #1 2ND PTG MOVIE VAR

Nick: Since there's never been a Skaar movie, I'm just going to assume that this variant cover features a picture of Schwarzenegger as Conan and the Marvel Comics pre-press production team Photoshopped his skin green.

SKY DOLL #3 (OF 3)
SPIDER-MAN PREM HC VOL 02 BRAND NEW DAY
ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR #56
ULTIMATE X-MEN TP VOL 18 APOCALYPSE
UNIVERSAL WAR ONE #1 (OF 3)
UNIVERSAL WAR ONE #1 (OF 3) US VAR
WAR IS HELL FIRST FLIGHT PHANTOM EAGLE MAX #5 (OF 5)
X-FACTOR #33 SI
X-FORCE #5 DWS

Nick: Everyone's favorite violence porn comic returns with more X-man on X-man aggression. Check out this issue for the completely nonsensical return of Archangel.

COMICS

ADULT STAR STORIES FELECIA NUDE PHOTO CVR #1

Nick: Now here's a title that sounds good.

AFTERBURN #4 (OF 4)
ALICE ON DEADLINES TP VOL 03
ANGEL AFTER THE FALL HC VOL 01
BANANA GAMES GN VOL 04 ONCE UPON A TIME PART 2

Nick: Obviously a tie-in to this week's "ADULT STAR STORIES FELECIA."

BIZENGHAST GN VOL 05 (OF 5)
BLUE GN
BROTHERS IN ARMS #2

Nick: Everyone's favorite gay incest comic returns for a second issue. (Also a tie-in to this week's "ADULT STAR STORIES FELECIA.")

BUDDHA STORY OF ENLIGHTENMENT #4
BURN #3 (OF 6)
CASE CLOSED GN VOL 24
CHIBI VAMPIRE GN VOL 09 (OF 13)
DAEMONIUM GN VOL 01 (OF 3)

Nick: Whoa! Someone had the spell check turned off on Microsoft Word when they came up with this title...

DARK GOODBYE GN VOL 02 (OF 3)
DOCK WALLOPER TP VOL 01
DOMINION TP
DREAMLAND CHRONICLES IDW #1
EC ARCHIVES WEIRD SCIENCE HC VOL 03
ELEMENTAL GELADE GN VOL 08 (OF 13)

Nick: Misprint by Diamond. Should read: "ELEMENTAL KOOL-AID GN VOL 08"

ELLIE MAMAHARA ALLEY OF FIRST LOVE GN
FALLEN ANGEL TP VOL 05
FORGOTTEN REALMS THE LEGACY #3 (OF 3) ATKINS CVR A
FORGOTTEN REALMS THE LEGACY #3 (OF 3) WALPOLE CVR B
GI JOE AMERICAS ELITE TP VOL 05 WWIII OMNIBUS
GOBLIN CHRONICLES #3 (OF 3) FOGEL CVR A
GOBLIN CHRONICLES #3 (OF 3) SUITOR CVR B
GWAI #1 (OF 4)

Nick: I got all excited and then I realized that this isn't the first issue of a four-part Gwar mini series.

HACK SLASH TP VOL 04 REVENGE OF THE RETURN
HELEN KILLER #3 (OF 4)
HOUDINI HANDCUFF KING SC

Nick: Another tie-in to this week's "ADULT STAR STORIES FELECIA."

KISS ALL THE BOYS GN VOL 02 (OF 3)

Nick: Yet another tie-in to this we-- oh, forget it. You already know the joke.

LEAVES ONE SHOT (MR)
MARTIN & JOHN GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
METHOD MAN GN

Nick: I really want this to be good. Marvel Comics should talk to the Wu-Tang Clan about doing some sort of Marvel Knights set of miniseries. Imagine Iron Man written by Ghostface, Ghost Rider written by Method Man, etc. At least get them in to do some sort of plotting / supervision for an alternate reality project. If you ask me, I think they should give a month of "in continuity" books to Wu-Tang and let them plot out a crossover.

MIDARA GN NEW PTG
MISTER MISTRESS GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
NEPHILIM GN VOL 02 (OF 2)
NYE INCIDENTS TP
OH MY GOD GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
PALS N GALS DOUBLE DIGEST #123

Nick: A tie-in to this week's "MARVEL ADVENTURES TWO-IN-ONE" (featuring hot She-Hulk action).

PLASTIC CHEW GN
PRETTY POISON GN
PRINCESS AI OF AI LAND
PSYCHIC POWER CHRONICLE NANAKI GN VOL 03 (OF 3)
RAMAYAN 3392 AD RELOADED #7 (OF 7)
REAL GN VOL 01
RISING STARS OF MANGA GN VOL 08 (OF 8)
ROADKILL ZOO GN

Nick: Wouldn't it be hilarious if this was just a collection of real-life roadkill photos with sarcastic captions and wordballoons Photoshopped in?

ROLLING GN VOL 01 (OF 6)
ROSE HIP ROSE GN VOL 02 (OF 4)
RUROUNI KENSHIN VIZBIG ED GN VOL 03 (OF 9)
SABRINA VOL 2 #95
SAMURAI DEEPER KYO GN VOL 29 (OF 38)

Nick: Misprint by Diamond. Should read: "SAMURAI DEEPER KY GN VOL 29" (And an obvious tie-in to this week's "MARVEL ADVENTURES TWO-IN-ONE" because they're definitely going to need lube.)

SCREAM QUEEN #2 (OF 5)
SECRET INVASION WHO DO YOU TRUST WWC SKETCH VAR
SEDUCTION MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN LOVE GN VOL 02 (OF 5)
SHOJO BEAT AUGUST 08
SILVER DIAMOND GN VOL 01

Nick: Your oxymoron for the week.

SIMPSONS COMICS #144
SOULFIRE CHAOS REIGN TP
SPARROW BOXED SET
SPIKE AFTER THE FALL #1 (OF 4)
SPIRAL BONDS OF REASONING TP VOL 04
STAR TREK MANGA GN VOL 03 (OF 3) UCHU
SUZUNARI GN VOL 01
TABOO DISTRICT GN
TALES FROM RIVERDALE DIGEST #29
TALES OF PENANCE TRIAL O/T CENTURY #1 (OF 4)
TANK GIRL VISIONS OF BOOGA #3

Nick: Damn! Diamond is misprinting up a storm. Should read: "TANK GIRL VISIONS OF BOOGERS #3"

TAROT WITCH OF THE BLACK ROSE TP VOL 06 PX LTD ED
TIKI JOE MYSTERIES TP VOL 01 HIGH STAKES PATSEY
TOKKO GN VOL 01
TRANSFORMERS MOVIE SEQUEL REIGN OF STARSCREAM #3
TRANSFORMERS SPOTLIGHT HARDHEAD
VASSALORD GN VOL 01 (OF 2)

Nick: A tie-in to this week's "SAMURAI DEEPER KY GN VOL 29" -- Nighthawk and Iron Man have to hit up their magical (and slippery) friend when the KY just doesn't seem to do the trick for Jen Walter's gamma-irradiated vagina.

VOLTRON A LEGEND FORGED #1
VOLTRON A LEGEND FORGED #1 PX FOIL CVR
WORLDS OF DUNGEONS & DRAGONS TP VOL 01
YOUR AND MY SECRET GN VOL 02 (OF 4)
ZMD ZOMBIES OF MASS DESTRUCTION #1 (OF 6)

Nick: Well would ya look at that?! The Bush Administration makes it into two comics this week!

ZORRO #5

Shipping This Week: JULY 10, 2008

DARK HORSE COMICS

BLOOD PLUS NOVEL VOL 02 CHEVALIER

Neal: So.... will there be variant blood? Type A, B, O, AB+, etc?

BPRD THE WARNING #1 (OF 5)
GOON #26

Neal: This book is about the rapper Plies and how he is trying to make "goon" into the 2008 version of "thug."

GOON #26 TOP SECRET ERIC POWELL VAR CVR
HELLBOY ODDEST JOBS TP

Nick: This infamous story features a down-on-his-luck Hellboy working as a janitor at a peep show.

INDIANA JONES & TOMB OF THE GODS #1

Nick: I can already guess where this story goes -- Dr. Jones shows up somewhere historically significant and breaks shit.

DC COMICS

100 BULLETS #93
ACTION COMICS #867
AMERICAN VIRGIN TP VOL 04 AROUND THE WORLD
BATMAN AND SON TP

Nick: If this comic has anything to do with the kind of "action" Batman and Robin see in their days spent out of costume, I want nothing to do with it. At. All.

BATMAN BLACK & WHITE BATMAN GOTHAM KNIGHT STATUE
BATMAN CONFIDENTIAL #19
BATMAN STRIKES #47
BOOSTER GOLD #1000000

Neal: That should read Boosted Gold $1,000,000.

CHUCK #2 (OF 6)

Nick: Chuck Dixon's epic autobiography about getting fired from DC Comics continues... oddly enough, published by DC Comics.

DETECTIVE COMICS #846 RIP
FINAL CRISIS REQUIEM #1

Nick: Finally! The DCU / Requiem for a Dream crossover I've been waiting for. Martian Manhunter dies from a heroin overdose while Marlon Wayans becomes a New God.

GREEN ARROW BLACK CANARY #10
GREEN LANTERN SER 3 CYBORG SUPERMAN AF
GREEN LANTERN SER 3 GREEN LANTERN BATMAN AF
GREEN LANTERN SER 3 SINESTRO AF
GREEN LANTERN SER 3 STAR SAPPHIRE AF

Nick: Next week: "GREEN LANTERN SER 3 RAINBOW BRITE AF"

HUNTRESS YEAR ONE #5 (OF 6)
JOKERS ASYLUM THE PENGUIN #1
JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA #17
KIKAIDER CODE 02 VOL 07
LEGION OF SUPER HEROES IN THE 31ST CENTURY #16
LOST BOYS REIGN OF FROGS #3 (OF 4)
NEW YORK FOUR
NUMBER OF THE BEAST #7 (OF 8)
TEEN TITANS SPOTLIGHT WONDER GIRL TP
TRINITY #6
VARIANTE VOL 04
WOMEN OF THE DCU SERIES 2 WONDER GIRL BUST

Nick: Wow. A bit on the racy side for DC, but I guess sex does sell.

WONDER WOMAN #22
YOUNG LIARS #5

Neal: What is a book on toddler parenting doing in here?

IMAGE COMICS

AGE OF BRONZE #27
CAPTAIN STONEHEART & THE TRUTH FAIRY HC

Nick: Beer, world's greatest "truth fairy" a.k.a. Captain Stoneheart gets drunk and spills the beans about his extramarital affair with Lieutenant Rockpants.

I KILL GIANTS #1 (OF 7)

Neal: Who doesn't?

PILOT SEASON URBAN MYTHS #1
SHARK-MAN #3

Nick: I'm still waiting for a Street Sharks revival. It's gonna be Jawsome!

SPAWN #180
STEVE NILES STRANGE CASES #4
WILDGUARD INSIDER #3 (OF 3)
WITCHBLADE #119 ROSS CVR B
WITCHBLADE #119 SEJIC CVR A

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-GIRL #22
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #565
ANITA BLAKE VH GUILTY PLEASURES TP VOL 01
ANNIHILATION CONQUEST HC BOOK 02

Nick: There's so much sexual innuendo potential in the above two titles that I'm not even going to make a joke about them. I'm just going to acknowledge the potential incase you missed it, and let you imagine a better a joke than I could ever write.

CAPTAIN AMERICA WHITE #0
CAPTAIN AMERICA WHITE #0 TIM SALE VAR
CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI 13 #3 SI
CRIMINAL TP VOL 03 DEAD AND DYING
ESSENTIAL DOCTOR STRANGE TP VOL 01 NEW ED
ETERNALS #2
GENEXT #3 (OF 5)
GUARDIANS OF GALAXY #3
HULK CHRONICLES WWH #1
HULK RED HULK MUST HAVE

Nick: Your oxymoron for the week, courtesy of Marvel Comics.

INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #2 2ND PTG LARROCA VAR
INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #3
IRON MAN LEGACY OF DOOM #4 (OF 4)
LAST DEFENDERS #5 (OF 6)
MARVEL ADVENTURES HULK #13

Nick: Haven't read this issue yet, but it's my pick of the week. MA Hulk is always great.

MS MARVEL TP VOL 04 MONSTER SMASH
NEW EXILES #8
NOVA #15
POWER PACK HC VOL 01
POWERS #29
RUNAWAYS PREM HC DEAD END KIDS
RUNAWAYS PREM HC DEAD END KIDS DM ED
SECRET INVASION #4 SI

Nick: In this issue: Spider-Woman and Tony Stark might finally get it on. If they go all the way and seal the deal, Marvel can consolidate their licensing efforts and focus on marketing eight-legged bio-robots that beat up bad guys by turning them on.

ULTIMATE ORIGINS #2 (OF 5)
ULTIMATE ORIGINS #2 (OF 5) DELL OTTO SKETCH VAR
UNCANNY X-MEN ALEX ROSS POSTER
WOLVERINE TP DEATH OF WOLVERINE
X-FORCE #4 2ND PTG CRAIN VAR
YOUNG X-MEN #4 DWS

COMICS

2000 AD #1591
2000 AD #1592
ACES CURSE O/T RED BARON GN

Nick: A graphic novel about a pizza mascot? Smells like comic book gold… and pizza.

ANUBIS DARK DESIRES #4
ARCHIE & FRIENDS #121
ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #190
ARMY OF DARKNESS XENA WHY NOT #4 (OF 4)

Neal: That sound you heard was a million Lucy Lawless and Bruce Campbell fantasies exploding in ecstasy.

AVALON HIGH CORONATION GN VOL 02 (OF 3) HOMECOMING
BAD KITTY GN VOL 01 CATNIPPED

Nick: And thus this week's terrific titles begin. This cover better feature some chick in a cat suit nipping out or I'm gonna be pissed.

BADGER SAVES THE WORLD TP
BASTARD TP VOL 17
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA ORIGINS #7
BERLIN #16
BLACK COAT 48-PAGE SPECIAL
BLOODRAYNE RAW III

Nick: This title could easily be seen on a porno DVD shipping list. Oh, but it would need the "HC" in there too for "Hard Core."

BLUE SKY GN
BODY COUNT SC
BONE COLOR ED HC VOL 08 TREASURE HUNTERS
BONE COLOR ED SC VOL 08 TREASURE HUNTERS

Nick: Hehehehe. "BONE"... "TREASURE HUNTERS"... This title could also easily be seen on a porno DVD shipping list. It would probably be a pirate-themed movie, with a tagline about how pirates love booty.

CHRONICLES OF THE GRIM PEDDLER GN VOL 01
CHUMBLE SPUZZ GN VOL 02 PIGEON MAN & DEATH SINGS THE BLUES

Nick: Drop the "PIGEON MAN & DEATH SINGS THE BLUES" and this title could easily be seen on a (you guessed it!) porno DVD shipping list.

CLASSIC TRANSFORMERS TP VOL 02
COLA MADNES TP
COLLECTION OF SHA TP
CSI DYING IN THE GUTTERS TP NEW PTG
CSI SECRET IDENTITY TP NEW PTG
DEAD SHE SAID #2
DEMONS REGRET #1
DEVI WITCHBLADE #1 LAND CVR
DEVI WITCHBLADE #1 SINGH CVR
DF ANGEL AFTER THE FALL #9 EX ALT CVR
DF AVENGERS INVADERS #2 EX ALT KRUEGER SGN CVR
DF PROJECT SUPERPOWERS #1 SGN CVR
DF ULTIMATE ORIGINS #1 EX ALT SGN CVR
DF WOLVERINE #66 EX ALT CVR
DOCTOR WHO CLASSICS TP VOL 01
DOG STYLE GN VOL 02

Nick: Do I even need to repeat the porno DVD shipping list joke?

DRAFTED #9
DRAGON CROSS #6
EXTRACT GN
FAMILY GN
FART PARTY GN

Nick: Two thoughts regarding this comic: 1) I've been to one of these parties before and it's not as fun as it sounds, and 2) Greatest. Title. Ever.

Neal: We used to have these a lot in college.

FAVOLE HC VOL 03 FROZEN LIGHT
FEMME NOIR DARK CITY DIARIES #1 (OF 4) BOLLAND CVR B
FEMME NOIR DARK CITY DIARIES #1 (OF 4) STATON & LOPEZ CVR A
FICTION CLEMENS #2 (OF 3)

Nick: A fictional reality wherein Roger Clemens doesn't take steroids.

FURRLOUGH #183
GACHA GACHA NEXT REVOLUTION GN VOL 07
GAMEKEEPER SERIES 2 #5
GENE SIMMONS ZIPPER TP VOL 01

Nick: This title straddles the line between being a vague sexual reference and just being stupid a comic book title.

GENTLEMAN JIM HC
GODDESS OF WAR #1 (OF 4)
GOLDEN PRINCE & ARGENT KING GN
GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN BOSTON TEA PARTY
GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN CREATION OF US CONSTITUTION

Nick: Ooo, the kids are really going to love that one.

GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN PAUL REVERES RIDE
GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN STAR SPANGLED BANNER
GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN STORY OF THE STATUE OF LIBERTY
GRAPHIC LIBRARY GN WINTER AT VALLEY FORGE

Nick: I've spent more than a few winters there and it's not nearly as educational as you would think. Just a lot of cheesesteaks and Eagles playoff games.

GROWING UP WITH COMICS GN

Nick: Been there, done that.

HACK SLASH SERIES #13 GRAHAM CVR B
HACK SLASH SERIES #13 SEELEY CVR A
HALO & SPROCKET TP VOL 02 NATURAL CREATURES
HARRY PORKER (ONE SHOT)

Nick: Hahahahaha. Another great title. How come I never actually see these comics in the store?

Neal: Ugh... this is totally porn.

HOT MEXICAN LOVE COMICS 2008

Nick: An annual issue commemorating the kind of sweet, sweet lovin' you'll find in a Taco Bell bathroom (sans air conditioning, of course).

Neal: Ditto.

INU YASHA TP VOL 34
KAGETORA GN VOL 10
KINGDOM HEARTS VOL 1-4 GN BOXED SET
KISS BLUE GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
KOLCHAK THE NIGHT STALKER THE LOVECRAFTIAN HORROR SC NEW PTG
KYLE BAKER NAT TURNER HC
KYLE BAKER NAT TURNER SC
LOOKING FOR GROUP #4
MAGIC WHISTLE TP VOL 11 BODY ARMOR FOR YOUR DIGNITY

Nick: "MAGIC WHISTLE"? Is R. Kelly making comic books now?

MEN OF MYSTERY #71
NECESSARY EVIL #6
NECESSARY EVIL TP VOL 01
NEGATIVE BURN #20
NINJA HIGH SCHOOL #161
NORTH WIND TP VOL 01

Nick: A tie-in to this week's "FART PARTY GN."

OMEN POSITIVE ISSUE
PHANTOM JUNGLE ACTION TP
RED COLORED ELEGY HC
RED RIVER GN VOL 22

Nick: Next week: YELLOW RIVER GN VOL 69

RED SONJA #35
SNAKED TP
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG #190
SPOOKS OMEGA TEAM #0
SWITCH GN VOL 03
TEMPEST #6
THIRTEEN STEPS #5
TOGARI TP VOL 07
TOTEM #6
TRANSFORMERS ALL HAIL MEGATRON #1
TRANSFORMERS MOVIE PREQUEL SAGA O/T ALLSPARK #1
TRANSFORMERS THE ARK TP VOL 02

Nick: A comic wherein huge movie franchises crossover as Indiana Jones shows up and breaks some historically significant Transformers.

UNWANTED GN

Nick: The timing of this GN is impeccable. The title is just crafty enough to trick enthusiastic summer blockbuster moviegoers that are lost in the bookstore. I have to say, on a slightly related note, how delighted I am to think of all the enthusiastic moviegoers that will actually go out and buy the Wanted TP only to find that the final page depicts Wesley as he fucks the reader in the ass. Mark Millar, you are a genius.

VAMPIRELLA COLLECTORS CLUB STARTER KIT
VERY VERY SWEET GN VOL 01
WOLFSKIN ANNUAL #1
WOLFSKIN ANNUAL #1 PAINTED CVR
WOLFSKIN ANNUAL #1 WRAP CVR
YAKITATE JAPAN TP VOL 12

Shipping This Week: JULY 2, 2008

DARK HORSE COMICS

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER #16
COMPLETE K CHRONICLES TP

Nick: Not to be confused with this week's "SPECIAL K CHRONICLES TP" from Kellogg's Comics.

HELLBOY THE CROOKED MAN #1 (OF
USAGI YOJIMBO TP VOL 22 TOMOES STORY
WONDERMARK BEARDS OF OUR FOREFATHERS

Nick: This must be that epic I've been waiting for about the history of beards. Finally! I thought this would never come out.

DC COMICS

ALL NEW ATOM #25
BATMAN #678 RIP
BILLY BATSON AND THE MAGIC OF SHAZAM #1
BLUE BEETLE #28
COUNTDOWN PRESENTS SEARCH FOR RAY PALMER TP
DARK KNIGHT BATARANGS PROP REPLICA

Nick: Impress and possibly frighten your friends by bringing these Batarang replicas to the park instead of your Frisbee.

DARK KNIGHT GRAPPLING LAUNCHER PROP REPLICA

Nick: Impress and possibly frighten your friends by bringing this fancy-named Bat Rope on your next rock-climbing excursion.

DC SPECIAL RAVEN #5 (OF 5)
FLAT EARTH EXCHANGE VOL 01

Nick: Finally! Some good hard evidence to debunk those morons that think the Earth is round. And since this is in comic book form, people will take it seriously.

INFINITY INC #11
JOKERS ASYLUM THE JOKER #1
JONAH HEX #33
LEGION OF SUPER HEROES #43
LOONEY TUNES #164

Nick: Isn't it bizarre how this series is up to 164 issues, but some of the best comics I've read can't get past the first 10 installments?

MANHUNTER #32
NEW DYNAMIX #4 (OF 5)
NIGHTWING #146
RANN THANAGAR HOLY WAR #3 (OF 8)
SHIRLEY

Nick: No issue number. No "TP" or "VOL" label. Not even a variant cover. Just "SHIRLEY." I must say, I'm seduced by the mystery of this book.

SHOWCASE PRESENTS BATMAN TP VOL 03
STEEL FIST RIKU VOL 01
STORMING PARADISE #1 (OF 6)
SUPERGIRL #31
SUPERMAN LAST SON HC
TEEN TITANS TP TITANS OF TOMORROW
TOR #3 (OF 6)
TRINITY #5
WAR THAT TIME FORGOT #3 (OF 12)
WATER BABY

Nick: New graphic novel by friend of the AudioShocker, Ross Campbell. Buy this.

WILDSTORM REVELATIONS TP

IMAGE COMICS

AFTER THE CAPE II TP
AMORY WARS II #2 (OF 5)
ASTOUNDING WOLF-MAN #7
BRIT #7
BRIT #7 ALT CONNECTING CVR
DYNAMO 5 #14

Nick: Good series. Very consistent. Try it.

FRESHMEN HC VOL 01
FRESHMEN SUMMER VACATION SPECIAL

Nick: Want to know what I did for my freshman summer vacation? I moved to a place I'd practically never been before, worked as a kids camp counselor at the local YMCA, and spent my entire summer without friends / with my parents. I can just about promise you that this special issue will be 100% less depressing than my freshman summer vacation. On the flip side, Nashville, TN did used to have a great discount comic book store where I was able to snag countless comic book steals for only $0.25 a piece. I can also just about promise you that this special issue will be waaay more expensive than that.

HYPERKINETIC #1 (OF 4)
LUCHA LIBRE #5
NOBLE CAUSES #35
SAVAGE DRAGON #136
SWORD TP VOL 01

Nick: This title is almost as tantalizing as "SHIRLEY." However, this is given both "TP" and "VOL" by Image Comics, so they totally lost their chance to sell me on it.

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #564
AMERICAN DREAM #5 (OF 5)

Nick: I'm so excited to see how this story ends that I was dreaming about it in bed this morning. I know you think I'm being sarcastic, but I'm 100% serious here.

ANITA BLAKE VH GUILTY PLEASURES HC VOL 02 DM ED
ASTONISHING X-MEN #25
AVENGERS INITIATIVE PREM HC VOL 02 KILLED ACTION

Nick: Not as awesome as VOL 01 (which happens to carry a quote on the back of the hardcover from a Comics News International review by yours truly), but still damn good.

AVENGERS INVADERS #3 (OF 12)
CABLE #5 DWS

Nick: The first appearance of She-Cable. I kid you not.

CAPTAIN AMERICA TP OPERATION REBIRTH NEW PTG
COUNTER X TP VOL 01 X-FORCE

Nick: Huh wha? Is "COUNTER X" referring to the new X-Force comic on the stands right now?

DARK TOWER END WORLD ALMANAC
DARK TOWER LONG ROAD HOME #5 (OF 5)
ESSENTIAL DEFENDERS TP VOL 4
FANTASTIC FOUR PREM HC LOST ADVENTURES STAN LEE
FANTASTIC FOUR PREM HC LOST ADVENTURES STAN LEE DM ED
INCREDIBLE HERCULES #117 2ND PTG SANDOVAL VAR SI
INVADERS CLASSIC TP VOL 2
LORDS OF AVALON SOD #6 (OF 6)

Nick: The unbelievable conclusion to this fantastic mini series of "how to" sod landscaping stories.

MARVEL 1985 #1 (OF 6) 2ND PTG EDWARDS VAR
MARVEL ADVENTURES SPIDER-MAN #41
MARVEL ILLUSTRATED THREE MUSKETEERS #2 (OF 6)
MARVEL TWO-IN-ONE #13
MIGHTY AVENGERS PREM HC VOL 02 VENOM BOMB

Nick: Someone better use Venom Bomb as a band name FAST!

PATSY WALKER HELLCAT #1 (OF 5)
PUNISHER WAR JOURNAL #21
SECRET INVASION #1 DIRECTORS CUT

Nick: If it wasn't already overpriced enough, now here's a shiny new printing for $4.99 instead of the usual $3.99.

SECRET INVASION FRONT LINE #1 (OF 5) SI

Nick: The art in this issue by GG Studios is quite impressive.

SQUADRON SUPREME 2 #1
STAND SKETCHBOOK

COMICS

100 PERCENT PERFECT GIRL GN VOL 06 (OF 10)

Nick: The sixth volume in a ten-part series of GN's about Justique. (She will never read this, but how awesome am I for putting this in here anyway?)

10TH MUSE GIANT ONE SHOT
2000 AD #1589
2000 AD #1590
ANGEL AFTER THE FALL #10
ARCANA GN VOL 09 (OF 10)
ARMY OF DARKNESS #10 LONG ROAD HOME
ATELIER MARIE AND ELIE ZARLBURG ALCHEMIST GN VOL 04 (OF 5)
BETTY & VERONICA DOUBLE DIGEST #162

Nick: Archie Comics does it again with another digest full of hot chick-on-chick action.

BLACK CAT TP VOL 15
BTX GN VOL 15 (OF 16)
CEMETERIANS TP VOL 1
CLAMP NO KISEKI MAGAZINE COLLECTIBLE VOL 12 (OF 12)
CLAYMORE TP VOL 12
COWA GN VOL 01
DF SECRET INVASION #2 EX ALT SGN CVR
DNA HACKER CHRONICLES #2 (OF 6)
DO WHATEVER YOU WANT GN VOL 03 (OF 6)

Nick: I love these comic titles that reinforce my life philosophy.

DOCTOR WHO #5
DOCTOR WHO CLASSICS #8
DOCTOR WHO TP WORLD SHAPERS
DRAGON EYE GN VOL 05
FAIRY TAIL GN VOL 03
FAT CHUNK GN VOL 01 ROBOT

Nick: HAHAHAHA Fat Chunk HAHAHAHA!

FOUR CONSTABLES SECRET O/T DELIRIUM DAGGER GN VOL 01
FRANK BELLAMYS ROBIN HOOD GN COMPLETE ADVENTURES

Nick: Who is Frank Bellamy and why did he stamp his name on this Robin Hood GN? Wasn't having a normal cover credit enough? On a related note, I once saw Bill Bellamy at the Miami airport.

FRUITS BASKET GN VOL 20 (OF 22)
FX #5 (OF 6)
GHOST WHISPERER #4
GI JOE AMERICAS ELITE #36
GIN TAMA TP VOL 07
GRIMM FAIRY TALES #28
GRIMM FAIRY TALES PIPER #3 (OF 4)
GUARDIAN HEARTS GN VOL 01 (OF 8)
GUN BLAZE WEST GN VOL 02
HAMLET GN NO FEAR SHAKESPEARE

Nick: The classic No Fear line of inspirational t-shirts from the 1990s makes its triumphant return as a series of Shakespeare graphic novels.

HIGH ROLLERS #1 (OF 4)
HIGH SCHOOL DEBUT GN VOL 04
HUNTER X HUNTER TP VOL 21
IGOR MOVIE PREQUEL #3
IN ODD WE TRUST GN

Nick: Ooo, another good title.

INDIA AUTHENTIC #14 SARASWATI
JFH JUSTICE FOR HIRE #4 (OF 12) CVR A
JFH JUSTICE FOR HIRE #4 (OF 12) JET BLACK CVR B
JUDGE DEATH YOUNG DEATH BOYHOOD OA SUPERFIEND GN
JUNK GN VOL 07 (OF 7)
KAMICHAMA KARIN-CHU GN VOL 01
KANNAZUKI NO MIKO DESTINY OF SHRINE MAIDEN GN VOL 02 (OF 2)
KING OF FIGHTERS 2003 TP VOL 05 (OF 5)

Nick: I think this book might be about five years late. Pretty normal for Kevin Smith. Maybe this is one of his comics...

KOI CUPID GN VOL 01
KUROHIME TP VOL 06
LA CORDA DORO TP VOL 08
LIGHTS OUT GN VOL 09 (OF 9)
LORE PREMIERE EDITION HC
LOVE COM TP VOL 07
LOVE THE WAY YOU LOVE #6
MACBETH GN NO FEAR SHAKESPEARE
MACK BOLAN THE EXECUTIONER DEVILS TOOLS #4 (OF 5)
MAMORU THE SHADOW PROTECTOR GN VOL 01 (OF
MARK OF THE SUCCUBUS GN VOL 03 (OF

Nick: "(OF" what? Just "(OF"??? How cryptic.

MINISTER JADE GN
MODESTY BLAISE TP VOL 01 GABRIEL SET UP NEW PTG
MUMMY MOVIE PREQUEL RISE & FALL OF XANGOS AX TP
MYTH TOLD TALES #1 MYTH CONGENIALITY

Nick: HAHAHA Myth Congeniality HAHAHA! Get it? Instead of Miss Congeniality, it's Myth Congeniality. Yet another good title.

NARUTO TP VOL 30

Nick: Uh oh. If you thought Secret Invasion #2 made Final Crisis #1 look bad, just wait and see what Naruto vol 30 does to the entire American comic book market.

NEVER GIVE UP GN VOL 08 (OF
NEW BATTLESTAR GALACTICA SEASON ZERO #10
NOSATSU JUNKIE GN VOL 06 (OF 11)
PICK O/T LITTER GN VOL 04 (OF 6)
PRINCE OF TENNIS GN VOL 26
PRIVATE SCHOOL GN VOL 01 (OF 2)
PUMPKIN SCISSORS GN VOL 03

Nick: Man, the bizarre titles are just flying fast and furious this week. Can you imagine scissors made out of pumpkin? They wouldn't cut anything! However, pumpkin pie scissors would be delicious.

QUEEN MARGOT GN VOL 03 ENDANGERED LOVE
QUEENS KNIGHT GN VOL 12 (OF 17)
RALPH SNART ADVENTURES #1
RAVE MASTER GN VOL 29 (OF 35)

Nick: He throws exploding glow sticks and shoots poison candy pacifiers down the throats of his enemies. Beware the wrath of the all night dancer on ecstasy. He is your master.

REBORN GN VOL 08
ROGUE ANGEL TELLER OF TALES #5
ROMANCE PAPA GN VOL 03 (OF 8)
ROMEO & JULIET GN NO FEAR SHAKESPEARE
SA GN VOL 05
SHAMAN KING TP VOL 17
SHONEN JUMP AUGUST 08
SIMPSONS SUPER SPECTACULAR #7
SIRE TP
SKIP BEAT TP VOL 13
STAR TREK ASSIGNMENT EARTH #3
STAR TREK MIRROR IMAGES #1
STAR TREK NEW FRONTIER #4
STAR TREK YEAR FOUR ENTERPRISE EXPERIMENT #3
STATION #1 (OF 5)

Nick: In a perfect world, this comic book would be a spin-off of Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey.

STEPHEN COLBERTS TEK JANSEN #2 (OF 5)

Nick: OMG! I didn't know this was an ongoing series. I thought the first issue was just a one shot. Didn't it come out like a year ago? Maybe this is an annual series...

STRANGE & STRANGER WORLD OF STEVE DITKO HC
STRAWBERRY 100 % TP VOL 05
STRONTIUM DOG FINAL SOLUTION TP
TALES FROM WONDERLAND ALICE ONE-SHOT
TALES OF TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES #47

Nick: Another amazingly consistent series. Snag this.

TERRY MOORES ECHO #4
TEZUKA DORORO GN VOL 02
TIME STRANGER KYOKO GN VOL 01
TRANSFORMERS BEST OF UK SPACE PIRATES #5
TURNING POINTS LITTLE ROCK NINE GN
ULTIMATE MUSCLE GN VOL 20

Nick: An awesome GN about my rock hard sexy body.

VERONICA #189
WARRIORS GN RISE OF SCOURGE
XXXHOLIC GN VOL 12

Nick: Why didn't somebody tell me that they're already 12 volumes into Neal's epic biography?

YU YU HAKUSHO TP VOL 15
ZIG ZAG GN VOL 03 (OF 7)
ZOMBIE TALES #2 CVR A
ZOMBIE TALES #2 CVR B

DARK HORSE COMICS

BPRD ECTOPLASMIC MAN ONE SHOT

Nick: If the name "Ectoplasmic Man" isn't sweet enough for you, then you must have an inner fan made out of jagged spikes of poison ice.

Neal: So... Slimer stars in Pinnochio?

CHRONICLES OF CONAN TP VOL 15 CORRIDOR OF MULLAH KAJAR
CONAN THE CIMMERIAN #0

Nick: Diamond Distributors %#cks up yet again! This book was originally solicited as "CONAN THE CINNAMON #0" and I pre-ordered it because it sounded delicious.

FEAR AGENT #22 1 AGAINST 1 (PT 1 OF 6)
GANTZ TP VOL 01

Nick: Justique loves this anime and it's one of the few newer shows I've been able to get into. I might pick this up.

INDIANA JONES ADVENTURES TP VOL 01
OH MY GODDESS RTL TP VOL 09
PIGEONS FROM HELL #3 (OF 4)

Nick: What?! I already missed two issues of a comic about street birds possessed by Satan? I am really behind the curve.

Neal: This isn't news. Everyone knows pigeons are hellfowl.

STAR WARS DARK TIMES #12 VECTOR PART 6

Neal: Honestly, when has the Star Wars Universe NOT been in dark times?

DC COMICS

ALL STAR BATMAN AND ROBIN THE BOY WONDER HC VOL 01

Nick: HAHAHA! "VOL 01" is just coming out. Wow, I remember back when this series started... ahhh, to be 5-years-old again. Those were the days.

BATMAN GOTHAM AFTER MIDNITE #2 (OF 12)
BATMAN JEKYLL AND HYDE TP
CARTOON NETWORK BLOCK PARTY #46

Nick: Not to be confused with Dave Chappelle's Block Party.

DARK KNIGHT BATMAN BUST
DARK KNIGHT THE JOKER BUST

Nick: These guys are just busting everywhere this week.

DC UNIVERSE SPECIAL REIGN IN HELL 80 PAGE GIANT

Nick: A special non-fiction comic book detailing the past two weeks of media coverage surrounding DC Comics.

FINAL CRISIS #2 (OF 7)

Nick: Not to be confused with "immediate crisis," the current modus operandi of DC Comics' public image.

GREEN LANTERN #32
GREEN LANTERN TALES OF THE SINESTRO CORPS HC
HUNTRESS YEAR ONE #4 (OF 6)
JSA CLASSIFIED #39
MOON CHILD VOL 11
NUMBER OF THE BEAST #6 (OF 8)
PROGRAMME #12 (OF 12)
SECRET HISTORY THE AUTHORITY HAWKSMOOR #4 (OF 6)
SUPERMAN #677
SUPERMAN CAMELOT FALLS TP VOL 01

Nick: Is this that erotic Superman / King Arthur crossover I've been waiting for? I can't wait to read the part where Supes puts his sword in Arthur's stone.

SUPERNATURAL RISING SON #3 (OF 6)
TANGENT COMICS TP VOL 03

Nick: Another non-fiction release. This one follows the horrid and confusing tangents of continuity created by the discrepancies between the work of Grant Morrison and everything else DC Comics puts out.

TEEN TITANS #60
TOWER OF THE FUTURE VOL 11
TRINITY #4
WORLD OF WARCRAFT DRAENEI PALADIN FIGURE
WORLD OF WARCRAFT DRAENEI PALADIN MASTER CASE
WORLD OF WARCRAFT SER 2 GNOME WARRIOR AF

Nick: If this is anything like a lawn gnome, I'm sold.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT SER 2 HUMAN WARRIOR AF
WORLD OF WARCRAFT SER 2 NIGHT ELF DRUID AF

Nick: This is my favorite of the WoW offerings this week. It's sort of like when you get the Neapolitan ice cream that has chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry all in one container.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT SER 2 TROLL PRIEST AF

IMAGE COMICS

ALETHEIA #2 (OF 3)
FRESHMEN TP LTD SGN ED
GIMOLES SECRETS OF THE SEASONS TP
PILOT SEASON ALIBI #1
SPAWN THE UNDEAD TP
VIX #1 (OF 3)
WITCHBLADE GENERATIONS WIZARD WORLD EXCL T/S LG
WITCHBLADE GENERATIONS WIZARD WORLD EXCL T/S MED
WITCHBLADE GENERATIONS WIZARD WORLD EXCL T/S XL

Nick: Another weird set of Microsoft Excel spreadsheet variants. Oh, Wizard! What will you think of next?

MARVEL COMICS

ANGEL REVELATIONS #2 (OF 5)

Nick: Part two of a five issue miniseries in which Angel realizes how lame he is.

AVENGERS FAIRY TALES #3 (OF 4)
AVENGERS INITIATIVE #14 SI

Nick: My pick of the week. Strawberries and pickles.

BLACK PANTHER #37
CAPTAIN AMERICA #39
CAPTAIN AMERICA PREM HC CHOSEN
CAPTAIN AMERICA PREM HC CHOSEN DM VAR
DAREDEVIL #108
FANTASTIC FOUR #558
HOUSE OF M TP AVENGERS

Nick: This comic is about the time the Avengers TP'd the House of M. Man, that was nuts. They were chucking toilet paper and eggs at the windows when Magneto came out all pissed. Everyone ran for the Quinjet, and they took off before Hawkeye could get onboard. Clint couldn't shoot straight for a week!

HULK #4
IMMORTAL IRON FIST #16
MARVEL 1985 #2 (OF 6)

Nick: Part two of a six issue miniseries in which Marvel pretends its 1985 all over again so they can sabotage The Dark Knight Returns and Watchmen before they hit the presses. Sorry, Marvel. Looks like you still won't make it onto the TIME Magazine Top 100 list.

MARVEL ADVENTURES FANTASTIC FOUR #37
MARVEL ATLAS TP
MARVEL COMICS PRESENTS #10
MARVEL ILLUSTRATED MOBY DICK #5 (OF 6)

Nick: I like how these stories have "illustrated" in the title as if none of the other Marvel comic books are drawn by hand.

MARVELS PREM HC
MARVELS PREM HC DM VAR ED VOL 13

Nick: Too many... abbreviations... in this title... hurts... burning my eyes!!!

MIGHTY AVENGERS #15 SI
MMW ATLAS ERA TALES OF SUSPENSE HC VOL 02
MMW ATLAS ERA TALES OF SUSPENSE HC VOL 02 VAR ED VOL 98

Nick: Hmmm, VOL 02 and VOL 98. How in the hell is that possible?

MS MARVEL #28 SI
MYTHOS CAPTAIN AMERICA
NEW AVENGERS #42 SI
NEW WARRIORS #13
OFF HB MARVEL UNIV A TO Z PREM HC VOL 03
POWER PACK DAY ONE #4 (OF 4)
RUNAWAYS #30

Neal: A.K.A. a really crappy book that used to be cool a loooooooong ass time ago.

SECRET INVASION RUNAWAYS YOUNG AVENGERS #1 (OF 3) SI

Nick: Hey Marvel, obviously you don't have enough teen characters in this book. You should add the Young X-Men, Generation X, the New Mutants, and both the old and new New Warriors. Now THAT would be a quality teen comic right there.

SHE-HULK 2 #30
SPIDER-MAN BY ROSS POSTER
THOR AGES OF THUNDER REIGN OF BLOOD

Nick: A What If? story in which Dan DiDio is the Editor-in-Chief of Marvel Comics.

THUNDERBOLTS #121
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #123
ULTIMATES 3 #4 (OF 5)
ULTIMATES 3 #4 (OF 5) FINCH VAR

Nick: Variant edition featuring the Ultimates on a bird watching excursion, spying on a nest of waxbill finches.

UNCANNY X-MEN #499 DWS
WOLVERINE FIRST CLASS #4
WOLVERINE ORIGINS #26
X-MEN FIRST CLASS VOL 2 #13
X-MEN LEGACY #213 DWS
X-MEN LEGACY FINCH PANORAMA POSTER

Nick: A poster featuring the cast of X-Men: Legacy on a bird watching excursion, spying on a nest of waxb-- oh whatever, you get the idea.

YOUNG AVENGERS PRESENTS #6 (OF 6)

OTHER COMICS

AND THEN ONE DAY #6
ANDRU AND ESPOSITOS GET LOST TP

Nick: Two friends arguing on the highway as they get lost on their way to Ozzfest.

AP HOW TO DRAW MANGA SUPERSIZED TP VOL 03
ARCHIE #586
ARCHIE AMERICANA SER TP VOL 08 BEST OF 60S BOOK 2
ARCHIE DIGEST #245
ASPEN SHOWCASE ASPEN MATTHEWS #1 ALE GARZA CVR
ASPEN SHOWCASE ASPEN MATTHEWS #1 TALENT CALDWELL CVR
BART SIMPSON COMICS #42
BEYOND #2 (OF 5)
BEYOND WONDERLAND #0 (OF 6)

Nick: Okay, since this starts with a #0, does that mean that it ends with #5 since it's "(OF 6)"? Or does it actually consist of seven issues and end with #6?

BLUESMAN HC
CAVEWOMAN RELOADED #6
CAVEWOMAN RELOADED SP ED #6
CLOCKWORK GIRL #4 (OF 4)
DEVI TP VOL 04
DF AVENGERS INVADERS #1 EX ALT CVR
DREADNOUGHT INVASION SIX #3 (OF 4)

Nick: I would consider buying this comic if it was titled "DOUGHNUT INVASION SIX" instead.

FIRE & BRIMSTONE #1 (OF 3)
FORGOTTEN HC
GOLD DIGGER #97

Neal: They spun out Veronica into her own book?

GOLD DIGGER SOURCEBOOK #18
GOLD DIGGER TIFFANY & CHARLOTTE #1 (OF 4)
JIM BUTCHERS DRESDEN FILES #3 (OF 4) WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE

Nick: Axel Rose and Slash make their triumphant return to Jim Butcher's Dresden Files.

KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE #140
KOLCHAK TALES NIGHT STALKER O/T LIVING DEAD #2 (OF 3)
LAIKA SC
MAN WITH NO NAME #2
NEARLY INFAMOUS ZANGO #3

Nick: I like this title. A lot.

NEOZOIC #5
ORDINARY VICTORIES WHAT IS PRECIOUS GN

Nick: I am. Question answered.

OZ WONDERLAND CHRONICLES JUSKO CVR A #3 (OF 4)
OZ WONDERLAND CHRONICLES ORBIK CVR B #3 (OF 4)
PHANTOM #24 CHECKMATE PART 4 (OF 5)
PROJECT SUPERPOWERS #4 (OF 7)
SILENT LEAVES THE LAST BONDSMAN GN VOL 01
SONIC X #34
STELLVIA TP VOL 1 - 2 SET
STRANDED #5
TALES FROM THE CLERKS LTD ED HC

Nick: As if it wasn't bad enough that they made two movies and a lame cartoon, now there's a limited edition hardcover about people who work at a convenience store.

WHAT IF FANTASTIC FOUR TRIBUTE TO MIKE WIERINGO
WORLDS OF DUNGEONS & DRAGONS #2 GOPEZ CVR A
WORLDS OF DUNGEONS & DRAGONS #2 WALPOLE CVR B

DARK HORSE COMICS

ALIENS OMNIBUS TP VOL 04
CLASSIC COMIC BOOK CHARACTERS #12 ROCKETEER
CONAN BORN ON THE BATTLEFIELD SC

Neal: Next week: Krull C-Section on the Battlefield.

GRENDEL BEHOLD THE DEVIL #8 (OF 8)

Nick: I always thought that this series would be way more enticing if the title was spelled just a little bit differently. Doesn't GRUNDLE BEHOLD THE DEVIL #8 have a much more entertaining ring to it?

HELLBOY II ART OF THE MOVIE SC

Neal: Basically, it's the Pan's Labyrinth bonus features disc.

HELLBOY II MMPB GOLDEN ARMY

Nick: "MMPB"? I have no idea what that could stand for. Maybe it stands for Mmm Mmm Peanut Butter. Or maybe Major Motion Picture Butter. Only Wednesday knows...

Neal: CAN NOT WAIT FOR THIS MOVIE.

POSTAGE STAMP FUNNIES HC

Nick: Collecting your favorite hilarious postage stamps from across the decades in this USPS sponsored book. Man, what will they think of next?

REX MUNDI DH ED #12
STAR WARS KNIGHTS OF OLD REPUBLIC #30 EXALTED PART 2 (OF 2)
STAR WARS LEGACY #25
STAR WARS LEGACY TP VOL 03

Nick: A series following the exploits of George Lucas as he plunders the once-great reputation of the Star Wars franchise. This is a non-fiction comic book.

UMBRELLA ACADEMY APOCALYPSE SUITE TP

DC COMICS

BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS #8
BIRDS OF PREY #119
BRAVE AND THE BOLD #14
CASEY BLUE BEYOND TOMORROW #2 (OF 6)
CATWOMAN #80
CHECKMATE #27

Nick: Chess greats Bobby Fisher and Anatoly Karpov volunteer for a secret government program to give them enhanced senses and super powers. Hilarity ensues. Now in its landmark 27th issue.

DC SPECIAL CYBORG #2 (OF 5)
DC WILDSTORM DREAMWAR #3 (OF 6)
FLASH #241
FROM EROICA WITH LOVE VOL 13

Nick: What's an Eroica? I know someone named Erica and I'm quite familiar with erotica, but this Eroica evades me.

GO GO HEAVEN VOL 06
GREEN LANTERN HC VOL 02 THE SINESTRO CORPS WAR
JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #22
MAD CLASSICS #22
MUSASHI #9 VOL 15

Neal: The brave fencer returns.

SCOOBY DOO #133
SHADOWPACT TP VOL 03 DARKNESS AND LIGHT

Nick: Please, I am so sick of this "the light and the darkness" themed work. It's ridiculous. There has to be a more interesting way of presenting the battle of good vs. evil. It barely even makes sense. For example, bright light hurts my eyes and darkness helps me get a good night's sleep. Where's your good vs. evil now, DC Comics?!

SHOWCASE PRESENTS SER 1 BATGIRL ACTION FIGURE
SHOWCASE PRESENTS SER 1 HAWKMAN ACTION FIGURE
SHOWCASE PRESENTS SER 1 SUPERMAN ACTION FIGURE
SHOWCASE PRESENTS THE FLASH TP VOL 02
SPIRIT #18
SUPER FRIENDS #4
SUPERMAN BATMAN #49

Nick: Same thing as Trinity, 'cept it's Dudes' Night Out. When Wonder Woman is away, the boys will play...

TANGENT SUPERMANS REIGN #4 (OF 12)
TEEN TITANS YEAR ONE #5 (OF 6)
TRINITY #3

Nick: The last time the planets will be in alignment until Big Hero 6 #6 hits comic book stores.

WORLD OF WARCRAFT #8

Neal: Because the video game isn't enough.

WORLDS FINEST DELUXE EDITION HC

Neal: This better be about hookers.

IMAGE COMICS

DEAD SPACE #4 (OF 6)

Nick: This is waaay too easy. I'll just let the title make fun of itself.

DYNAMO 5 TP VOL 02 MOMENTS OF TRUTH
FIRST BORN AFTERMATH (ONE SHOT)
GEMINI #2 (OF 5)
KILL ALL PARENTS #1

Nick: Sure to be a big hit with the under 18 crowd. Actually, now that I think about it, this is sure to be an all ages hit.

PILOT SEASON GENIUS #1
PVP TP VOL 05 PVP TREKS ON
SAFEST PLACE GN

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #563
AMERICAN DREAM #4 (OF 5)

Nick: A series in which I marry a stripper and never leave the house again. And get paid for it.

ANITA BLAKE VH GUILTY PLEASURES #12 (OF 12)
ASTONISHING X-MEN TP VOL 04 UNSTOPPABLE

Nick: Good thing UNSTOPPABLE doesn't refer to the shipping schedule of this series! Oh, ZING! In your face, Whedon and Cassaday!!!

CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI 13 #1 2ND PTG KIRK VAR

Nick: Please be a William Shatner photo variant cover. That would totally make my Wednesday.

ETERNALS BY NEIL GAIMAN TP
GHOST RIDER #24
GUARDIANS OF GALAXY #1 2ND PTG PELLETIER VAR
GUARDIANS OF GALAXY #2
HULK WWH TP DAMAGE CONTROL

Nick: This was a great three issue mini series. You should pick it up. It's got tons more funny than this blog post.

INCREDIBLE HERCULES #118
IRON MAN DIRECTOR OF SHIELD #30
IRON MAN TP HAUNTED
JACK KIRBYS GALACTIC BOUNTY HUNTERS TP VOL 01
MARVEL ADVENTURES AVENGERS #25

Nick: An excellent comic book, hitting its 25th issue nonetheless. I hope it's around for many more.

MARVEL ADVENTURES AVENGERS TP VOL 06 MIGHTY DIGEST
MARVEL ADVENTURES TWO-IN-ONE #12

Nick: Marvel's comic book for the DVDA demographic.

MARVEL ILLUSTRATED ILIAD #7 (OF 8)
MMW SGT FURY HC VOL 02
MMW SGT FURY HC VOL 02 VAR ED VOL 97
SECRET INVASION FANTASTIC FOUR #2 (OF 3) SI
THOR AGES OF THUNDER 2ND PTG ZIRCHER VAR
ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR #55 $2.99
ULTIMATE FANTASTIC FOUR TP VOL 10 GHOSTS
ULTIMATE X-MEN #95
ULTIMATES 3 MARCH ON ULTIMATUM MUST-HAVE

Nick: This title is the king of all oxymorons.

WOLVERINE #66 DWS
WOLVERINE #66 TURNER SKETCH VAR

Nick: My pick of the week. I've already read the issue and it's terrific.

X-FACTOR #32 DWS

OTHER COMICS

100 GIRLS GN
ADOLESCENT RADIOACTIVE BLACK BELT HAMSTERS #4

Neal: Really? Do I even need to explain how ridiculous this sounds?

ADVENTURES OF DEXTER BREAKFAST SEASON TWO GN VOL 02

Nick: I'm gonna be pissed if there are no waffles on the cover of this comic book.

ANGEL AFTER THE FALL #9
ANGEL AFTER THE FALL #9 LTD FOIL ED

Nick: OH NO @#$%ING WAY. Foil variant covers make their hideous return. Head for the hills! It's all about to craaash!!!

ANIMA GN VOL 08 (OF 10)
ASPEN SPLASH 2008 SWIMSUIT SPECTACULAR

Nick: I've never understood the appeal of a swimsuit comic book. Plus, nowadays, you get better stuff for free on the Internet... just minus the swimsuits.

ATOMIC ROBO TP VOL 01
BART SIMPSON COMICS #15
BART SIMPSON COMICS #16
BETTY & VERONICA #236
BETTY & VERONICA DIGEST #185
BLOOD BOWL #1 (OF 5) KILLER CONTRACT CVR A
BLOOD BOWL #1 (OF 5) KILLER CONTRACT CVR B

Nick: I really hope there's a still life painting of a bowl full of blood on the cover of this comic book. And since there's a variant, I hope one of them is in watercolor and the other is in Cray-Pas. (That was an art school joke -- did anyone get it?)

BOGLE GN VOL 01

Nick: Your favorite board game finally comes to comics! Witness the mind-blowing action as three friends try to spell words out of a bunch of random letters.

CAT EYED BOY GN VOL 01
CAT EYED BOY GN VOL 02
CHIGGERS HC

Neal: Aren't chiggers those gross bug things that burrow into your skin? Eww. Shit is gross.

CHIGGERS SC
CTHULHU TALES #3 CVR A

Neal: Gesundheit! Now what is this about tail?

CTHULHU TALES #3 CVR B
DAN DARE OVERSIZED UK HC VOL 01
DEAN KOONTZS FRANKENSTEIN VOL 01 #2 (OF 5) PRODIGAL SON
DIARY OF MOLLY FREDRICKSON PEANUT BUTTER FULL COLOR GN VOL 0

Nick: This is a tie-in to Dark Horse's "HELLBOY II MMPB GOLDEN ARMY." See, I told you MMPB had something to do with George Washington Carver.

DK GRAPHIC READERS SPY CATCHER GANG SC
DK GRAPHIC READERS WAGON TRAIN ADV SC
DOCK WALLOPER #5 (OF 5)

Neal: Dock Walloper - the rough and tumble tails of Popeye.

DOT HACK SIGN GU GN VOL 02 (OF 3)
DOT HACK XXXX GN VOL 01 (OF 2)

Nick: Is it just me or do those DOT HACK books have the most incoherent comic book titles of all time?

EVERYBODYS DEAD #4

Nick: Great title. Doesn't get much better, save for last week's "YOU ARE AWESOME" or whatever that comic was called.

FRUITS BASKET ULTIMATE EDITION VOL 03 (OF 4)

Neal: There is a gay joke in here somewhere.

GAKUEN ALICE GN VOL 03 (OF 14)
GEORGE R R MARTINS WILD CARDS #3 (OF 6) HARD CALL
GOTHIC AND LOLITA BIBLE VOL 02 (OF 6)

Nick: Stands to be the weirdest interpretation of the New Testament EVER.

INUBAKA CRAZY FOR DOGS TP VOL 09

Nick: This is a misspelling on the part of Diamond Distributors. The actual title is "EUKANUBA CRAZY FOR DOGS TP VOL 09."

JUGHEADS DOUBLE DIGEST #141
KADE SHIVAS SUN #4 (OF 4)
KING OF HELL GN VOL 19 (OF 26)
KUROGANE COMMUNICATION GN VOL 01

Nick: This is a misspelling on the part of Diamond Distributors. The actual title is "ROGAINE COMMUNICATION GN VOL 01."

LADY DEATH ICON #1 S/N ED
LOVE AND CAPES #7
ME & MY BROTHERS GN VOL 04 (OF 8)
MEN OF MYSTERY SPOTLIGHT SPECIAL VOL 03 FOX FEATURES
MUMMY MOVIE PREQUEL RISE & FALL OF XANGOS AX #3
NAOKI URASAWAS MONSTER TP VOL 15
POCKET FULL OF RAIN SC

Nick: A fascinating yet completely impossible concept.

PS238 #32
RAMAYAN 3392 AD RELOADED #6 (OF 7)
RASL #2
SARDINE IN OUTER SPACE SC VOL 05 OTE PRICE

Nick: SPOILER ALERT! The ending: it still smells even in the everlasting vacuum of space. Next month: ANCHOVY IN OUTER SPACE. (Hint: the ending is the same.)

SHOJO BEAT JULY 08
SIMPSONS COMICS #143
SIMPSONS COMICS #92
SIMPSONS COMICS #93
SIMPSONS SUPER SPECTACULAR #1
SIMPSONS SUPER SPECTACULAR #2
SPARKS #1 (OF 8)
TAROT CAFE GN VOL 07 (OF 7)

Nick: This is a misspelling on the part of Diamond Distributors. The actual title is "CARROT CAKE GN VOL 07 (OF 7)."

TRANSFORMERS ANIMATED TP VOL 03
TRANSFORMERS BEAST WARS SOURCEBOOK TP
TRANSFORMERS MOVIE PREQUEL SPECIAL
TRANSFORMERS SPOTLIGHT CYCLONUS
TRANSFORMERS SPOTLIGHT WHEELIE
TURNING POINTS SONS OF LIBERTY GN
WARHAMMER CONDEMNED BY FIRE #2 (OF 5) CVR A
WARHAMMER CONDEMNED BY FIRE #2 (OF 5) CVR B
WISE MAN SLEEPS GN VOL 02

Nick: He sure does. Speaking of which, it's time for a nap.

WOLF #1
YGGDRASIL GN VOL 01
ZORRO #4

Shipping This Week: JUNE 11, 2008

DARK HORSE COMICS

BPRD WAR ON FROGS #1

Nick: I hope that the letterer of this book uses "BPRD!" as SFX if anyone steps on a frog in this issue.

FEAR AGENT #21 HATCHET JOB (PT 5 OF 5)
FLUFFY HC

Nick: The touching story about a fluffer and his meteoric rise through the porn industry.

Neal: Sounds odd.

GOON #25
GUNGRAVE BUST
HELLBOY 3 PIECE PVC SET

Nick: A collection of three PVC pipes with Hellboy logos printed on them. Custom plumbing is the new variant cover.

Neal: Kinky!

HELLBOY BOOK & FIGURE SET
JOURNAL DOMO FLOCKED

Nick: To come up with the title of this book, the author fanned through the dictionary and randomly slammed a finger down to select the words.

PENNY ARCADE TP VOL 05 THE CASE OF THE MUMMYS GOLD
SAVAGE SWORD COLLECTION BUST #2 KING KULL
STAR WARS REBELLION #14 SMALL VICTORIES PART 4 (OF 4)

DC COMICS

ABSOLUTE SANDMAN HC VOL 03

Nick: Sandman flavored vodka. Also the new variant cover.

ACTION COMICS #866
BATMAN #676 RIP 2ND PTG

Nick: I'm unclear on this one. Does "RIP" mean that the issue will show up pre-damaged? (Maybe it's like those jeans they sell brand new with the holes already in them) Then again, "RIP" could just be the DC Comics abbreviation for ripoff. At least they're warning you.

BATMAN CONFIDENTIAL #18
BATMAN STRIKES #46
BOOSTER GOLD #10

Nick: Buster Gold: Ladies love him, Neal wants to be him.

Neal: Buster Gold strikes again.

BURNOUT

Nick: A story set in the "real world" about a comic book fan who has event fatigue.

CARTOON NETWORK ACTION PACK #26
CHUCK #1 (OF 6)

Nick: Chuck Dixon's autobiographical epic story about trying to find a way to make Robin kickass despite the short shorts and slippers.

DARK KNIGHT BATMAN 1/6 SCALE DELUXE FIGURE
DARK KNIGHT THE JOKER 1/6 SCALE COLLECTOR FIGURE
DC MINIMATES WAVE EIGHT
DC UNIVERSE SPECIAL SUPERMAN MONGUL

Nick: Sort of like Superman: Red Son but this one takes place in northern China. Oh wait-- that would be Superman Mongol... Nevermind. I have no idea what this is about.

GOTHAM UNDERGROUND #9 (OF 9)
GREEN ARROW BLACK CANARY #9
GREEN LANTERN CORPS #25
HUNTRESS YEAR ONE #3 (OF 6)
JOKER THE GREATEST STORIES EVER TOLD TP
JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA HC VOL 03 INJUSTICE LEAGUE
LEGION OF SUPER HEROES IN THE 31ST CENTURY #15

Nick: What a poorly named comic book. What if this series stays popular until the 32nd century? This won't be futuristic at all then! DC Comics will be just as screwed as 20th Century Fox in the year 2001.

MAD MAGAZINE #491
METAMORPHO YEAR ONE TP
NUMBER OF THE BEAST #5 (OF 8)

Nick: This series won't get good until #666. Oh, wait... it ends at #8. That's too bad.

PROGRAMME TP VOL 01
QUESTION THE FIVE BOOKS OF BLOOD HC
SALVATION RUN #7 (OF 7)
SALVATION RUN #7 (OF 7) VAR ED

Nick: A variant edition of Salvation Run #7 featuring Ed McMahon on the cover. They should have gone with custom plumbing instead.

SIMON DARK #9
TERU TERU X SHONEN VOL 02
TINY TITANS #5
TITANS #3
TRINITY #2

Nick: This series won't get good until #3. See, it says it right there in the title.

WILL EISNERS SPIRIT ARCHIVES HC VOL 24
WONDER WOMAN #21
IMAGE COMICS

AMAZING JOY BUZZARDS GN VOL 01 HERE COME THE SPIDERS
CHARLATAN BALL #1
ELEPHANTMEN #12

Nick: The touching story of three men with elephantitis and their meteoric rise through the Guinness Book of World Records, competing to see who has the most hideously inflated testicles.

INVINCIBLE #50
INVINCIBLE #50 ALT CONNECTING CVR
JACK STAFF #17

Nick: Not only is this Neal's favorite comic book, it's also his favorite pastime.

MADMAN ATOMIC COMICS #9
MAGDALENA DAREDEVIL (ONE SHOT)
PILOT SEASON LADY PENDRAGON #1
RED MASS FOR MARS #1 (OF 4)
SCREAMLAND #4 (OF 5)
WILDGUARD INSIDER #2 (OF 3)
WITCHBLADE #116 WIZARD WORLD LA EXCL VAR

Nick: A variant edition of Witchblade #116 that comes with an Excel spreadsheet from Wizard's accounting department, detailing the expenses of this year's Wizard World Los Angeles convention.

WITCHBLADE ORIGINS TP VOL 01 GENESIS

MARVEL COMICS

AMAZING SPIDER-GIRL #21
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #562
ASTONISHING X-MEN BIANCHI POSTER
CAPTAIN AMERICA TP VOL 01 DEATH OF CAPTAIN AMERICA

Nick: A rather deceptive title considering that there are currently a minimum of three Captain Americas running around the 616 Marvel Universe.

CAPTAIN BRITAIN AND MI 13 #2 SI
CIVIL WAR CHRONICLES #12

Nick: The long awaited conclusion to the Marvel Universe / Narnia epic crossover.

CLANDESTINE #5 (OF 5)
DARK TOWER LONG ROAD HOME #2 (OF 5) 2ND PTG VAR
ETERNALS #1
ETERNALS #1 ACUNA WHITE VAR
ETERNALS BY JACK KIRBY TP BOOK 01
GENEXT #2 (OF 5)
HULK RAGING THUNDER

Nick: Awesome title. Yeah, I'm sure it's another Hulk one shot stuffed with reprints and jacked up to an unattractive price, but I'll be damned if that title isn't sweet.

INCREDIBLE HERCULES AGAINST WORLD PREM HC
INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #1 2ND PTG LARROCA VAR
INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #1 2ND PTG MEINERDING VAR

Nick: Is Marvel Comics releasing two variant versions of the 2nd printing??? We already got three variant versions of the 1st printing! This is nuts.

IRON MAN LEGACY OF DOOM #3 (OF 4)

Nick: My pick of the week. This issue is just plain crazy fun.

IRON MAN VIVA LAS VEGAS #1 (OF 4)

Nick: Tony Stark takes a Vegas holiday. Alcoholic billionaire genius + Las Vegas = Bad things happen.

LAST DEFENDERS #4 (OF 6)
MARVEL ADVENTURES HULK #12
MARVEL ILLUSTRATED THREE MUSKETEERS #1 (OF 6)

Nick: Funny story -- I used to live down the street from the guy who designed the Three Musketeers candy bar logo. Unfortunately, this is not an illustrated candy bar. It is, instead, some sort of comic book thing. Whatever.

MARVEL ZOMBIES 02 HC
MIGHTY AVENGERS #13 2ND PTG YU VAR
MOON KNIGHT #19
NEW AVENGERS #40 2ND PTG CHEUNG VAR
NEW EXILES #7
NEWUNIVERSAL SHOCKFRONT #2 (OF 6)
SECRET INVASION #1 3RD PTG YU VAR
SECRET INVASION #2 2ND PTG YU VAR
SECRET INVASION WHO DO YOU TRUST

Nick: Not a comic book, but actually a collection of prose interviews conducted by Marvel Comics as they interview fans to find out if they will actually trust Marvel again after they find out how much it costs to buy the entire Secret Invasion event from start to finish.

SILVER SURFER TP IN THY NAME
SKAAR SON OF HULK #1

Nick: Next month: Skratch, Illegitimate Daughter of Hulk #1. Hey, don't judge the guy. Hulk was king, and kings have needs just like the rest of us.

SPIDER-MAN MAGAZINE #1
SPIDER-MAN WITH GREAT POWER #4 (OF 5)
TWELVE #6 (OF 12)

Nick: Judging on the title, this series won't get good until its final issue. Bummer.

ULTIMATE X-MEN HC VOL 08
WOLVERINE TP ENEMY OF STATE ULTIMATE COLLECTION
X-FORCE AINT NO DOG

Nick: Isn't no dog, X-Force. Or maybe aren't. Ain't ain't a word! And that whole no dog thing is bad grammar too. Scrap this title and start from Skratch-- er, I mean scratch.

OTHER COMICS

2000 AD #1587
2000 AD #1588

Nick: Again, just a poorly named comic book. One part of me wants to say that this book won't get good until #2000, while the other part of me wonders if this is just a series set eight years in the past. For more on naming your entertainment property after a specific time, see this week's DC Comics.

AMAZING AGENT LUNA OMNIBUS TP VOL 01
AMERICAN TERROR GN VOL 01 CONFESSION OF A HUMAN SMART BOMB
ANGEL AFTER THE FALL #8
ARCHIE & FRIENDS #120
AVATAR CINEMANGA GN VOL 07 (OF 8)
BLACK GOD TP VOL 03
BOY WHO MADE SILENCE #4

Nick: The touching story of a boy who constantly drops "silent but deadly" farts in public.

BOYS OVER FLOWERS TP VOL 30

Nick: A new, more sensitive variation on "bro's before ho's."

BURN #2 (OF 6)
CLASSICS ILLUSTRATED THE INVISIBLE MAN

Nick: This is genius. I wish I had thought of this. The guy is invisible! That means you don't even have to draw him!!! Of course, that also means this comic book should always come out on time. If you don't even have to draw the main character, there is absolutely no excuse for missing your ship date.

CLIFTON TP VOL 05 JADE
COMPLETE LITTLE ORPHAN ANNIE HC VOL 01
CONTRACT #0
DF SECRET INVASION #1 SGN ED
DOROTHY OF OZ GN VOL 03
DRAFTED #8
DRAGON HUNTER GN VOL 18 (OF 26)
DRAGON KNIGHTS GN VOL 26 (OF 26)
ELEVENTH HOUR GN VOL 01
FAERIES LANDING GN VOL 19 (OF 19)
FALL OF CTHULHU #13 CVR A
FALL OF CTHULHU #13 CVR B
FIST OF JUSTICE #2

Nick: Next month: Foot of Fairness #2.

FORGET ABOUT LOVE GN VOL 01 (OF 7)
FREDDIE & ME GN COMING OF AGE BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY

Nick: I hope this is really a GN about Freddie Mercury. I'll be totally pissed if I get to the comic shop and it's about Freddie Kruger.

GIMMICK GN VOL 01 $9.99
GOLD DIGGER II POCKET MANGA VOL 04
GREEN MANOR GN VOL 01 ASSASSINS & GENTLEMEN
HELSING LEGACY BORN TP
HERO SQUARED TP VOL 02 ANOTHER FINE MESS

Nick: The touching story of a teen superhero struggling to get through algebra class. Of course, the only available tutor is the local supervillainess. Sexy study time and a lot of confusing moral questions follow.

HOLLOW FIELDS GN VOL 02
I WISH GN VOL 02 (OF 7)
INU YASHA ANI MANGA GN VOL 27
JAMES BOND TP PARADISE PLOT
JIM BUTCHERS DRESDEN FILES #1 (OF 4) 2ND PTG
JUDGE DREDD HENRY FLINT COLLECTION TP
LAW OF UEKI TP VOL 12
LAZARUS IMMORTAL COILS #1 (OF 5)
LOCKE & KEY #5
MISSILE HAPPY GN VOL 03 (OF 5)

Nick: The touching story of a second generation US president that's just trying to make his daddy proud.

NIGHTMARE INSPECTOR YUMEKUI KENBUN GN VOL 02
O PARTS HUNTER TP VOL 10
ONE POUND GOSPEL GN VOL 01 2ND ED

Nick: I don't know if you've ever picked up a bible, but I got news for you: that book weighs way more than one pound.

OUT OF PICTURE SC VOL 02
PALS N GALS DOUBLE DIGEST #122
PHONICS COMICS LEVEL 1 FIX IT CREW
PHONICS COMICS LEVEL 2 TUTU TWINS
PHONICS COMICS LEVEL 3 DUKE AND FANG
RAVEN CHRONICLES TP VOL 01 CURIOUS CASE OF RAVEN INC
RECAST GN VOL 06 (OF 6)
RISING STARS OF MANGA UK & IRELAND ED GN 03 (OF 7)
RURE GN VOL 03 (OF 6)
SHAKUGAN NO SHANA TP VOL 03
SILENT HILL SINNERS REWARD #4
SLAINE THE KING SC NEW PTG
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG #189
STRAWBERRY MARSHMALLOW GN VOL 05 (OF 5)

Nick: This sounds delicious. Normally I don't like my marshmallows flavored, but I'm really hungry right now.

SUCCUBUS #1

Nick: The touching story of my girlfriend from sophomore year of college and her need to emotionally drain me whenever humanly possible.

SUNSHINE SKETCH TP VOL 01
TACTICS GN VOL 05 (OF 8)
UNCLE SCROOGE #376
UTOPIAS AVENGER GN VOL 05
VAISTRON TP VOL 01 $12.95
WALT DISNEYS COMICS & STORIES #691
WALT DISNEYS SPRING FEVER TP VOL 02

Nick: Just looking at the title, it's obvious that this is definitely shipping late. It looks like this should have been out two months ago. Way to go, Disney. You fucked up again.

WARHAMMER 40K DAMNATION CRUSADE #2 IRONORC ED

Neal: You know, I used to play 40k, that game was dope. What ever happened to it? Oh wait, now I remember, Games Workshop decided it wasn't worth the effort as a tabletop game, but as a universe it was rife for you know... books and online mmorpgs.

WARHAMMER FORGE OF WAR #2 IRONORC ED
YOURE SO COOL GN VOL 01 (RES)

Nick: Thanks. I know I am. (I think I'll buy this one just for the title…)

ZATCH BELL GN VOL 19
ZOMBIE LOAN TP VOL 03

Nick: The touching story of a brain-hungry undead family and their struggle to secure a small business loan despite the ingrained institutional prejudice against lending money to zombies.

Keeping it short and sweet this week, I'm going to pass along a link to more free comics online. Ahhh, free comics how I love you…

This week we're checking out Gemini #1 for free. I'm a big Dynamo 5 fan, a series by Jay Faerber and Mahmud A Asrar. Since Gemini is written by Faerber as well, I caught a bunch of previews in the back of my Dynamo 5 issues.

Well, I didn't get to pick up Gemini #1. But now I can read the first issue of Gemini for free over on Newsarama. I'm ashamed to say that at the time of writing this, I still haven't read the comic. But I'm a busy guy, damn it.

Speaking of which, the AudioShocker (a.k.a. just me) will be at Wizard World Philadelphia this weekend (a.k.a. just Saturday for a few hours). Email me at nick@audioshocker.com if you want to meet up and say hi. Feel free to attach nude photos to your email (ladies only, please).

So attending a comic book convention for the first time after reading comics for over 20 years was interesting. It just wasn't what I expected. Ever been to a trade show or a business convention? It's just like that except the attendees wear tights instead of suits. The booths and the salesmen are all still there, from retailers that go straight to the consumer all the way through to niche businesses geared especially towards the convention-going small press comic book creator.

And I wasn't even at one of the huge conventions. I was at the Pittsburgh Comicon, celebrating its 15th anniversary this year under some extremely unusual circumstances. I enjoyed myself in the sense that nothing went wrong. But I feel so disconnected from the convention culture. I love comics for the craft, for the stories, for the characters, and for the sweeping metaphors. I suspect, however, that if I really want to make the comic book industry my career field of choice, I need to learn to love comicons too.

As for Reads You Need, may I recommend Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #45. It felt like autumn today here in the Steel City, and this comic book made me feel like October arrived early. This eerie tale is a solid example of why I've read more consecutive issues of Tales of the TMNT on a month-to-month basis than any other comic book series. Coming in a close second is Dynamo 5 #12, which finally pays off a plot tangent about the character Myriad that was introduced way back in issue #7.

Before I go, I should let everyone know that Avatar: The Last Airbender Book 3 Chapters 14 and 15 are online. I've watched both of them (a two-parter called "The Boiling Rock") and I thoroughly the episodes. Chapter 14 is mostly setup -- and Chapter 15 is doubly good when it really brings the plot home. If you're trying to find these episodes, here are links to Chapter 14 and Chapter 15. Enjoy (and check out the video description on Chapter 15 for more).

Inspired by Dynamo 5 #10

For years, it seemed like comic books owned superheroes by virtue of being the introductory medium. For a long time it seemed like Marvel Comics and DC Comics exclusively owned superheroes (even going so far as to trademark the words "superhero" and "super-hero").

Nowadays, many people would claim that Hollywood owns superheroes. Lately, superheroes seem to be most lucrative as fodder for movie scripts. Then again, maybe licensing owns superheroes. Go to your local dollar discount store, Target, and Wal-Mart - Marvel and DC characters are plastered on everything from t-shirts to backpacks to mugs to bed sheets to pajamas to cake decorations.

But at the end of the day, I think fans own superheroes. The beauty of the superhero concept is that these larger-than-life protagonists are metaphorical for the latent potential we all have inside of us. The reason Dynamo 5 can be an incredible interpretation of the superhero without being published by the Big Two, without a movie, and without licensing? It's written and visualized by fans.

The passion behind the creation of the Dynamo 5 is evident in every issue. It's a testament to the creators' love for superheroes and their amazing possibilities. Without the fans, there would be no one to watch the movies, no one to buy the pens and trinkets, and certainly no one to run Marvel or DC. Just like tall tales and mythology, it takes a devoted audience for storytellers and artists to bring superhero dreams to life.

Mighty Avengers #6 ended the delayed first arc of this series with stellar results. Brian Michael Bendis and Frank Cho produced a wonderful team effort that reads like a dream and looks like a comics masterpiece. Standout moments include Cho's visualization of Ultron's antivirus efforts, the Wasp's heroic moment, and the Sentry's emotional revelation.

Kyle Baker's second issue of Special Forces came out one month after the first and delivered an equally rousing story in only 22 pages. Frankly, I didn't expect to see this series follow up so quickly with a part-two. I'm glad it did because Baker's interpretation of a modern day war story is thoughtful and intriguing while never slacking in action.

Special Forces feels different though. More than ever, Kyle Baker is taking notice of his lettering. He does a particularly excellent job with the sound effects, dialog, and captions in this issue. In fact, when I go to letter my own comic in the next few months, I'm going to use Special Forces #1 as a blueprint.

This story has a lot of heart. I don't like war stories at all, normally. But this spoke to me. It mattered how each individual soldier got there and why they went. By the time I read the last two pages, I had tears welling in my eyes. I don't know why... it wasn't a sad moment. It wasn't especially victorious either. It was just the tragically beautiful humanity of the characters that moved me.

Don't believe me? Go pick up Casanova #10 and tell me I'm wrong. It's the AudioShocker comic pick of the week. And this was a good week too. My perennial favorite series, Black Panther, came out with issue #31 this week. Plus there's an issue of Tales of the TMNT I haven't even read yet (I never read that book in time to give it top picks... sorry TMNT... I really do love you). So Cass had some decent competition to reach the top spot.

But this sexy issue breezed right by without any extra effort. These great issues of Casanova are life affirming and remind me why I read comics. Thank you Mr. Fraction and Mr. Moon for another outstanding installment of your insane sequentials.