Yes you read that headline correctly, I do not want to stick it to SJP. Obviously, there is her resemblance to Dee Snyder. It is well documented so I won’t waste ink on it, but it really is uncanny. Also, in Flight of the Navigator - she kind of shouts out Twisted Sister - almost foreshadowing the hilarious reality.
Maybe the real problem is that I can’t divorce SJP from Carrie Bradshaw. Sex and The City never entertained me and as a straight teenage guy living in New Haven, it didn’t have much for me to relate to. And that would be fine, if there weren’t an ‘epic’ movie being shoved in my face.
Parker hit the career-making-role jackpot with Carrie - but it’s a double-edged sword. While she’ll be remembered for popularizing Cosmopolitans and Manolos - she’ll also be associated with Carrie’s narcissism and selfishness. As occasional AS contributor Kirsten ‘The Kitchen’ notes, “…whenever one of the other girls complains about her life, Carrie finds a way to make a pun and bring the conversation back to herself.”
Perhaps I’m just too hung up on SATC, but I’m sorry SJP: I do not want to stick it to you. My sincerest apologies.
I will be taking a brief transatlantic starting tomorrow to the UK for about a week. I apologize in advance. Video reviews and “Girls I’d Like to Stick it to” will return upon my repatriation. In the mean time, check out our blogroll, read our bios, and peep the archives.
And remember, you can always reach me, Nick, or Justique anytime by emailing us @ audioshocker.com
Women’s volleyball is one of the sexiest team sports around - and I am not talking about the beach ‘n bikini variety.
For years, I associated volleyball with high-fiving watch-check flexing Naval Aviators and overtanned dudes in sandlots surrounded by ESPN cameras.
Nay, it wasn’t until my chi-chi education, at Choate Rosemary Hall, that I had my revelation. What changed my mind? I’ll tell you what it wasn’t: mandatory team sports participation — but that is a discussion for another day.
Everything about the female volleyball uniform exudes sex. Refer to the figure at right.
The tiny spandex shorts accentuate the gluteals and give even the stumpiest of ladies a willowy profile. Kneepads (not shown) serve double duty: adding contrast to the outfit and providing some much kneeded (har har) protection. Jerseys vary from the small and clingy (shown) to the baggy and NBA-esque. Ponytails, frenchbraids, and the occasional headband are the coiffures of choice.
If that sounds good at rest - imagine it in motion. From the first set to the last desperate bump pass, ladies volleyball is a multi-sensory experience. Powerful serves yield resonating thumps - quickly drowned out by grunts, heel screeches, and players calling out “I got it!” As the game progresses you can feel the breeze of every vengeful spike and dive. And when the final volley ends you can smell defeat, while across the net the winners huddle together jumping and cheering.
The composite effect is in a word, mesmerizing.
In summary: Volleyball Girl - I want to stick it to you. Shorts, kneepads, ponytail, and all.
Photo: Curbstonecritic
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