Tag Archive for 'Fantastic Four'Page 2 of 4

The Top 9 Biggest Superhero Movie Mistakes of the Past Ten Years

Well, well, well! Looks like last week's Top 9 list made the rounds over on IMDB and Superhero Hype!, and WOW did people hate it. Regardless, I still stand by it. And I think this week's ranting countdown is even better!

9. Jessica Alba's blue eyes in 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer. I actually love this film, to the chagrin of many superhero movie enthusiasts on the Internet. But one thing nearly ruined the movie for me - Jessica Alba's fake blue eyes. Aside from the fact that the first Fantastic Four film featured Alba's far more subtle peepers, her new contacts were an unreal shade of disturbing (and distracting) blue. Still, they could never be as distracting as...

8. Christian Bale's husky voice in Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. I don't care for the new Batman movies, but I do recognize how much they satisfy their audience. Still, there's one negative thing that most fans agree on: Bale's Batman voice is ridiculous. His husky, throaty whisper is enough to make me crack up during even the most serious and thrilling scenes. But even though Bale's Batman needs a little vocal work, he's still light years ahead of...

7. Ben Affleck starring as Matt Murdock in Daredevil. There was just something supremely wrong with Matt Damon's boy toy taking the lead role in Daredevil. He was stiff, he didn't look the part, and his bad acting destroyed any chance of a redeeming sequel. Instead, it gave us an ever crappier spinoff movie because apparently...

6. Someone thought it was a good idea to make an Elektra solo film. Elektra Natchios was played by Jennifer Garner in a skimpy Spandex outfit. I assume that's the only reason why this horrid Daredevil spinoff got the green light, because the rest of the movie is shit. Still, a solo Elektra movie could never be as bad as...

5. A Catwoman film removed from everything Batman. Warner Bros. decided to make Catwoman a legacy character and remove her feline ferocity from the Batman franchise with Halle Berry's Catwoman solo film. Don't get me wrong - Catwoman is a great character. But taking her out of the Batman universe is a slap in the face to loyal Batman fans and a confusing turn of events for the general public. Unfortunately, this wasn't the only superhero flub perpetrated by...

4. Halle Berry. That's right. Not only did this actress crap on Catwoman, she took a dump on Storm too (in three consecutive X-Men films!). That's four awful superhero performances in one decade. Why, Halle? WHY??? At least she wasn't cast in...

3. The obnoxious musical number featured in Spider-Man 3. I truly enjoyed the beginning of Spider-Man 3... until I realized that I was watching a Spider-Man movie and not a romantic comedy about three friends caught in a love triangle. Upon realizing how lame that was, Sam Raimi delivered the killing blow - a Toby Maguire song and dance number. Something inside me died that day. The decision to include this musical interlude is only eclipsed by the misguided decision to make...

2. Superman Returns as a sequel. Now this is supremely hypocritical on my part because I've never seen the film. But did I even need to? It's a sequel to Superman II... a movie I didn't even like that was made over 25 years ago!!! To make matters worse, Bryan Singer ditched the X-Men franchise to make this film, which leads us to...

1. X-Men: The Last Stand. The whole movie. One. Big. Mistake.

More: The Top 9 DC Comics Movies Warner Bros. Should Be Making Right Now.

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

AudioShocker Podcast #70 - Chris G on Mini Marvels, Secret Invasion and Chun-Li Eat Our Brains

Chris Giarrusso talks about Mini Marvels: Secret Invasion and his work with Marvel Comics. We discuss writing one-page gags vs. continuous stories, working solo vs. working with collaborators, Hawkeye, Skrulls, Thor, and tons more. And be back next week when Chris talks about his creator owned work with Image Comics, G-Man!

Then Justique, Neal, and Nick talk about Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li, Street Fighter IV, The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian, famous film names re-titled to be porn movies, Jigoku Shoujo anime a.k.a. Hell Girl, the Watchmen movie, Secret Invasion hardcover collection by Bendis and Lenil Yu, and Iron Man: Armor Wars.

AudioShocker Podcast #59 - Chocolate Rain Body Doubles

Dark Reign is at Marvel Comics as Secret Invasion ends, Nick wonders if Bucky is the emo Captain America, Neal is creeped out by the cover to Wolverine: First Class #12, Punisher: War Zone is a great date movie, Elisha Cuthbert uses a body double in He Was a Quiet Man, Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa is awesome, and GrandCentral sucks for turning off invites.

Click here to visit the AudioShocker Store!

The Top 9 Superhero Vehicles

9. Fantomex's E.V.A.. From Grant Morrison's run on New X-Men comes Fantomex and his mutant gift, which acts as both his external nervous system AND his kickass transportation.

8. Captain America's Motorcycle. Kind of a boring inclusion, but you gotta admit that Cap looks sweet when he's tearing it up on his bike. Bonus points for the use of Cap's motorcycle in the 80s made-for-TV movies.

7. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' Turtle Van. Well, in the comics, if I'm not mistaken... it's just a van. But in the cartoon, it was a tricked out mobile fortress! And the toy was pretty excellent as well. TURTLE POWER!

6. Avengers' Quinjet. I feel like I had to include this one not because it's that great but because it's a memorable superhero vehicle.

5. X-Men's Blackbird. I love the Blackbird. Some of the most intense X-Men drama has happened aboard this vessel. If this list were based strictly on good memories, this would be #1.

4. Batman's Batmobile. Yeah, it's the Batmobile. It's classic. It's iconic. Me, I prefer the old school hot rod style Batmobile. The modern ones lack a certain flashy charisma.

3. Fantastic Four's Fantasticar. Look, it splits apart. Isn't that enough for you? Plus, this damn thing has been to how many different dimensions? It's awesome.

2. Wonder Woman's Invisible Plane. It's a plane. It's invisible. It's an invisible plane. How does it work? WHO KNOWS??? What I do know: it rules.

1. Silver Surfer's Board. You really can't top the combination of the Power Cosmic and surfing. I mean, hell, the Silver Surfer is the ultimate mobile superhero! To this day I still pretend I'm the philosophic chromed-out guy-formerly-known-as-Norrin-Radd whenever I use my skateboard to go to the grocery store.

Next: The Top 9 Comic Book Superpowers!

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

The Top 9 Best Live-Action Superhero Movies (Note: You Will Disagree With This)

Here, in painstakingly particular (and genius) order, are the Top 9 Best Live-Action Superhero Movies of all-time:

9. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990)
8. Blade (1998)
7. Batman: The Movie (1966)
6. X2 (2005)
5. Batman Returns (1992)
4. Iron Man (2008)
3. Batman (1989)
2. X-Men (2000)
1. Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)

I know what you must be thinking. "Nick," you're saying to yourself, "You are completely out of your @#$%ing mind." But go back and reread the list. The effect should sound something like, "Wait… this list is actually quite brilliant."

So here's the thing: I KNOW that people out there will disagree with me. If you think there's a better Top 9 Best Live-Action Superhero Movies, then post your version in the comments.

However, if you don't post your own version of this Top 9, I will consider my list as unchallenged and therefore the definitive list of Best Live-Action Superhero Movies by default.

More: The Top 9 Ways to Piss Me Off in the Movie Theater!

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.