Neal gets runny at Qdoba and then he watches Wrist Cutters: A Love Story, he hates baby name books, Justique marvels at the bizarre mullet worn by Dave Coulier in Full House, Mandy Moore goes all Amanda Leigh on us, Nick believes in nut shots as contemporary American art, Katy Perry is a Zooey Deschanel that can sing (except Zooey Deschanel can also sing), the new Melanie Fiona album, Bridget the Midget and Amy Fisher do special appearances at local venues, Welcome to the NHK is an awesome anime, Neal hates falsetto, Neal read Locke and Key: Welcome to Lovecraft, Ron Howard loves Lovecraft (who loved cthulhus), Nick loves Iron Man and five free plays of Marvel vs. Capcom at the arcade and playing Darkstalkers: The Night Warriors for the first time, and Justique explains succubus vs. incubus.
Tag Archive for 'Britney Spears'
Lady Gaga and her disco stick summer jam Love Game get us started as we spiral into conversation about the new album Potato Hole by Booker T Jones (not to mention our beatbox acapella performance of Green Onions), El Michaels and instrumental Wu-Tang Clan songs, The Knife and their music video for We Share Our Mother's Health, the Tom Tom Club album Live at the Clubhouse (we unleash another beatbox acapella performance, this time Genius of Love), and upcoming movies we want to watch including Star Trek and X-Men Origins: Wolverine.
Then the podcast goes interactive as we ask listeners to join along as we visit www.freecomicbookday.com to make our picks for Free Comic Book Day 2009. We check out the full range of books available for FCBD on Saturday, May 2nd, 2009 as we chat about comics (and more) including Avengers, Blackest Night #0, Bongo Comics, Love and Rockets, Mercy Sparx, Archie Comics, GI Joe Resolute, Fist of Justice, the art of Gurihiru, Street Fighter IV #2, the TMNT 25th anniversary, and tons more.
Paul Tobin braves his third week in a row on the AudioShocker as he wraps up his chat with Nick about writing comics book for money. This clear-cut capitalist exchange leads to discussion on the topics of: scripting, ideas, Colleen Coover, Jack Kirby, Jeff Parker, Marvel Adventures, and tons more. Plus, Paul announces some upcoming projects and refuses to announce others! FUN!
Then we bring you your regularly scheduled program: Neal does not understand Lady Gaga so Justique tries to explain her appeal. Justique does not understand M.I.A. so Neal tries to explain her appeal. Meanwhile, Alan Arkin gets slammed for Sunshine Cleaning. Nick demands to know the etymology of the Stanky Leg (not the Stanky Legg!). Then Neal insists on talking about mixtapes that no one has ever heard about (no one, that is, according to Nick). This somehow leads to the revelation that MTV is going to start showing music videos again... too little too late, MTV!!!
We kick it off with a concert review of the Britney Spears Circus show in Pittsburgh featuring a special surprise interview with Britney herself... okay NOT really, but the Pussycat Dolls were there too, then we dig into the history of the Pussycat Dolls and Nicole Scherzinger, Fierce Diva Tranny Bitch too of course, Justique thinks Ciara looks like a man, Neal can't finish Rachel Getting Married, Neal enjoyed the epic Sharp Teeth werewolf poem written in free verse, Justique enjoyed The Living and the Dead graphic novel, Nick enjoyed the latest issue of the Street Fighter II Turbo comic book featuring a backup story with Crimson Viper, and more More MORE!
Ok people, the internet and I do not have a new music video review for you. Instead, please consider the following list of MTV Music Video Awards winners from 1999 and tell me it isn't suspect.
| Video Of The Year | Lauryn Hill, “Doo Wop (That Thing)” |
| Male Video | Will Smith, “Miami” |
| Female Video | Lauryn Hill, “Doo Wop (That Thing)” |
| Group Video | TLC, “No Scrubs” |
| Rap Video | Jay-Z feat. Ja Rule & Amil-Lion, “Can I Get A …” |
| Dance Video | Ricky Martin, “Livin' La Vida Loca” |
| Rock Video | Korn, “Freak on a Leash” |
| Hip-Hop Video | Beastie Boys, “Intergalactic” |
| New Artist | Eminem, “My Name Is” |
| Video from a Film | Madonna, “Beautiful Stranger, ”Austin Powers 2 |
| R&B Video | Lauryn Hill, “Doo Wop (That Thing)” |
| Direction | Fatboy Slim, “Praise You” |
| Choreography | Fatboy Slim, “Praise You” |
| Art Direction | Lauryn Hill, “Doo Wop (That Thing)” |
| Editing | Korn, “Freak on a Leash” |
| Cinematography | Marilyn Manson, “The Dope Show,” |
| Special Effects | Garbage, “Special” |
| Breakthrough Video | Fatboy Slim, “Praise You” |
| Viewers' Choice | Backstreet Boys, “I Want It That Way (source: Infoplease.com) |
I think It is remarkable that out of 19 categories, Lauryn Hill walked away with 4 Moon Men, and Fatboy Slim took 3. Were the post-Fugees and overly accessible 'techno' that appealing to our collective musical pallete? (Ugh, FUCK Moby) Additionally, I have no idea how Will Smith's Miami got Best Male Video (and why are there gender specific categories?). Gettin' Jiggy Wit' It was great in 1998, but past success should not be used as a basis for future accolades.
And weren't boy bands huge until at least 2001? How then did the Backstreet Boys get Viewer's Choice but nothing else? I call shenanigans all over this list. Nonplussed, I dug deeper and pulled up the 1998 list. While it skews toward rock/alt, Madonna's Ray of Light just totally kills it - 5 Moon Men! How is Madonna spastically moving in front of a green screen worthy of awards for great choreography, direction, or editing? Could it be sales?
Let's look into that, according to the BillBoard Hot 100 and The Village Voice, the top single of 1999 was either Cher's Believe or TLC's No Scrubs. I don't see Lauryn Hill or Fatboy Slim anywhere. This suggests that the VMAs are based on something other than spins or sales. Fair enough, this is the Video Music Awards. But wait...
BOMBSHELL - Britney Spears' first single...Baby One More Time was released in Q4 1998, the album was released January 12th 1999, and the 1999 VMAs were in September. It does not add up. How is it that from 1998-2000, Spears won exactly zero Moon Men? Seriously, how many of you called TRL to request that video?
Personally, I am a little surprised that TLC's No Scrubs didn't clean up. That video was what 1999 was all about - hip hop explicitly defining the vernacular and the end of the shiny suit. TLC was pretty huge in the 90s: Creep, Waterfalls, etc., and No Scrubs was a major hit. Even Jay-Z and rat-faced Ja Rule's Can I get A... or Ricky Martin's Livin' La Vida Loca would have been better choices than Doo Wop or Praise You.
Of course, the VMAs are indicative of nothing. They do not represent music sales, viewer requests, or any other quantifiable measure. Like all awards shows, they are a foil for shameless PR, red carpet pageantry, live performances, and mirror-facing self-congratulatory masturbation. It looks like MTV has recently (at least in 2008) extended the voting process to the public. Still, who are they fooling? You can't divorce a song from its music video. Nobody wants to watch a music video, no matter how awesome it is, if the accompanying song does not appeal to them.
Granted, my argument may have a few holes, and this is all based on two hours of armchair research, but I just cannot buy the 1999 MTV VMA results.
Here is big my question for the MTV VMA judges/voting committee: If Nick and I shoot a UAL video and pony up some guap, can we have the 2009 awards for Best Group/Rap/Breakthrough Video? We need to know soon, so that we can get our entourage ready.
Neal wants to see Black Snake Moan because he loves Christina Ricci, Teen Wolf is surprisingly subversive, The Spirit is filmed in Millervision, Peyton Reed and Craig Alpert make Yes Man a great movie, Neal thinks "Just Like Me" by Jamie Foxx and T.I. is just okay, War Machine #1 by Greg Pak and Leonardo Manco stars a different Rhodey than Nick is used to, and Neal wants to know if superheroes movies pull more from old comics or new comics.
Video game documentaries The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters and Chasing Ghosts: Beyond the Arcade show two different versions of Billy Mitchell, Bigger Faster Stronger makes Neal want to take steroids, Kinamand makes Nick hungry for Chinese food, the Death Note live action films have sweet computer graphics, Neal can't stop watching Dark Angel and Jessica Alba, Nick hates Pixar's WALL-E, Busta Rhymes' "Arab Money" is ignorant, Neal discovers Borders is trimming their graphic novels section, and Nick can't stop thinking about War Machine.
Last week I took you back to Monterrey, Mexico circa 2006 and told you all about Julietta Venegas. I enjoyed that so much that this week I'm throwing it back even further, back to 1998 and one of my shitty weather favorites: Eagle-Eye Cherry's Save Tonight. This is just one of those great 90s videos that didn't take itself too seriously and came out moderately funny. Granted, none of us have heard much from Eagle-Eye ever since, but at least we have this gem to remember him by. (Yes, it is a busy week at work, and no, I do not have time to review Britney Spear's new video Circus)
If you have been following the AudioShocker you know that I judge music based on 4 things: the beat, the video, the vocals and content. Let me break down the new Britney Spears single, Piece of Me, right quick.
The Beat - The beat is more abrasive than a Gobi Desert sandstorm. I honestly had to stop listening to the song after about 30 seconds and take an Aspirin. The track was produced by Bloodshy & Avant, the same Swedish gents that we can thank for such gems as Toxic and Me Against the Music.
The Video - This video consists of 4 things in rotation: Britney, video girls, paparazzi, and tabloid covers. The video girls are not even remotely relevant, but I suppose it's not a pop video without them. Sidenote - Is there a union for video girls? Britney sports a post-Sabrina Melissa Joan Heart look which seems a bit out place. This video is remarkably forgettable.
The Vocals - Using a Vocoder is a crime and I hereby sentence Britney to 25-life! (That goes double for Cher and triple for T-Pain). What is up with producers and the Vocoder? There is not a single second of this track that is vocoder-free.
Please support our Vocoder Boycott. We can stop the industry from cramming over produced, untalented garbage like this into our ear holes with our wallets.
Content - The song itself can be summed up in the following statement, 'Yall wish you were as popular with the media and paparazzi as me. However you are not and I am, so stop hatin!' In that respect, maybe there is some witty truth in the opening line, 'I'm Miss American Dream since I was 17'. Then again, Britney has a line about trying to be a good working mommy and being unique or something. That is funny since she is filthy rich and everyone in Hollywood is preggers. Fuck, even Jessica Alba has a baby bump now.
The bottom line? If this were a Paris Hilton video I could easily write it off and move on. However, this is Britney Spears and I expect more from my pop stars. Cowgirl up and entertain me Britney - because this shit doesn't cut it.
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