AudioShocker

Sakura Hyper Combo Wallpaper!

nick marino — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 10:06:53 +0000

DOWNLOAD WALLPAPER :: 1280 X 1024 :: 1440 X 900 :: 1600 X 1200

We’re knee deep in Street Fighter Month, so be back here next Monday for some Chun-Li Hyper Combo Wallpaper!

Kickboxer (1989) – TXT Message Review

nick marino — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 10:06:18 +0000

Kickboxer (1989) – 9/10 – ALMOST as good as Bloodsport, which means this is really good. Van Damme’s performance might be his best.

The Top 9 Comic Book Superheroes Who Can Fly (Based on Awesomeness)

nick marino — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 15:10:11 +0000

9. Martian Manhunter

8. Banshee

7. Falcon

6. Power Girl

5. Vision

4. War Machine

3. G-Man

2. Storm

1. Superman

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

Super Haters #19 – Misunderstood

nick marino — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 11:06:33 +0000

Television, Agent of Hydra

neal — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:53:20 +0000

When I lived alone, in Peoria of all places, I did not have cable. I survived on Netflix, Bittorrent, and during my last 2 years Hulu. It worked fairly well, but things were just inconvenient enough that following more than three or four shows concurrently was unwieldy. Then I moved to NYC and started living with four other dudes, three TV’s, two DVRs, and a dynamite non-strike TV season (Glee!). Combine that with a schedule that doesn’t have much slack and things get hairy.

‘Rational’ folks might simply say: stop watching so much TV, or catch up on the weekend, DVR everything, cut down on your shows, and the patently ridiculous – wait for the DVD. Listen folks, none of those solutions are 100% feasible, even in combination. I’m at school almost all week, literally. TV time is my time and keeps me from imploding. DVR space is limited with 4 roommates. And wait for the DVDs? Do you start buying PS3 gear when the PS5 comes out? Yeah, didn’t think so.

The only real solution I see is one of tough love: divorcing shows. There are plenty of quick wins with this strategy. Heroes sucked from the get go, and letting go mid-season 2 was a breath of fresh air to my schedule. HIMYM made it easy by sucking so much after season 3. Scrubs was a no-brainer once I woke up and realized how un-endearing Sac Breath Braff really was. Alas, these are but the low hanging fruit.

Cut off one show and two more shall take its place!

Powerhouses like House has proven a bit harder to quit. I keep going back to it, and even Tim Roth’s Lie to Me has shown great tenacity. But I’m done with them. I can no longer tolerate Hugh Laurie or Dr. Lightman. But, there exists a fundamental problem with this hack and slashery.

Every time you cut out a show, those wily TV execs throw two more in your way. (eh eh, see how good I am with titles) After quitting House, Parks and Recreation popped into my rotation and brought The League with it just to add insult to injury. I mean fuck, when did TV Execs wake up and start making moderately entertaining shows with just enough laugh value to engage me? Goddamn you superior formula based programming!!!!

Even when shows cut themselves off (ATHF, Sealab 2020, Home Movies), new shit springs up to replace them (The Venture Brothers, Squidbillies, Metalocalypse). And don’t get me started on the half/summer season shows on HBO/Showtime or delayed starts like Chuck. Ugh.

I’m not sure how to handle this ridiculous head/show proliferation, but it’s only a matter of time before my entire week is devoted to TV and I become an indoor kid again, complete with orange Cheeto fingers.

In short: FML

A Podcast with Ross and Nick #23 – The Mystery History of 23

nick marino — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:06:41 +0000

23 and tea, Basinger and Baldwin make Ross hot, Netflix suggestions suck for Nick, Denzel vs. Van Damme, Andrew Davis in HD, Shadoweyes wants to kill Tommy Lee Jones, is the Punisher racist?, explicit comics in the library, Ross needs to write a Steve Wilkos comic, Frank Quitely can’t precede other artists, and rejection burnout. Next time: the 4th Letter and heroes that don’t kill!

AudioShocker Podcast #105 – Trannies on the Train

nick marino — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 13:23:33 +0000

Metalocalypse and Dethklok, Street Fighter III, Master of Mosquiton, Lil Wayne, Norah Jones, The Life of Lucky Cucumber, Jean-Claude Van Damme in Desert Heat and In Hell, Danny Trejo vs. Luis Guzman, The Mysteries of Pittsburgh, and way mucho more.

Culturology 049 – Based on Facts

pete — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:07:12 +0000

I didn’t go to see it, and probably won’t ever, but there’s a movie out right now that perhaps you’ve heard of: The Fourth Kind. Apparently, it’s about a spate of alien abductions that happened once upon a time in Alaska, during, like, a sleep study or something. It seems to have had some amount of success marketing itself, since I had two friends separately bring it up to me as something that might be worth seeing. Apparently it uses, like, real clips of an actual sleep study. When my one friend mentioned that fact, my reaction was something to the extent of “What, they used actual footage of people waking up?” This strikes me as another step down the strange line of “realism” that Hollywood’s been walking for a while now. A cousin of the Batman people having Gotham obviously be Chicago to make it seem, like, more real (recently, I’ve been thinking that maybe, as Gotham gets more and more real, maybe Chicago will steadily become imaginary; that’d be cool).

As if images of the “real” world somehow add veracity to the movie’s fictional enterprise. The trailers for 4th Kind have this “you decide what’s real.” Though I don’t really want to defend the actual world against fictional adaptations, I’m just feeling rather tired of the whole thing. Apparently, I guess, Paranormal Activity, was in a similar vein, insofar as it was similar to The Blair Witch Project. What a fad. Aristotle (without sounding too much like a graduate school A-hole (or sounding just like one, but intentionally so)), I reckon, would remind us that theater is intended as a mimesis of real life, but also that that representation of the real requires careful control and plot-making acumen. Little splashes of notions of things being “based on facts” or, like, looking, like, totally real are just surface level attempts at such things.

My other friend that mentioned T4K to me brought up the fact that apparently the alien abductions that are the subject of the movie were actually the actions of a serial killer. He was rather incensed at the notion of turning an actual spate of serial killings into an alien thing. I’m not sure if I agree or not, but a cursory internet search told me that the investigators of the supposed serial killings decided that it was probably just alcohol abuse and suicide doing most of the disappearing. And alcohol abuse is certainly fair game for reinterpretation as alien abductions.

This all somehow also matches my disdain for the contemporary memoir. So it is similarly vulnerable to the complaint that I hate this stuff without actually reading or watching it. But that’s just it; I’m giving my reasons for not bothering with this stuff. I guess I just don’t like stories that keep it real. They’re real alright. Real boring.

This Week in That Guy #2: Stephen Tobolowsky

We had some discussion last week as to what, precisely makes a guy That Guy. Stephen Tobolowsky matches the criteria perfectly: he’s in all kinds of movies and TV shows, but never in a particularly big role. Mr. Tobolowsky oftentimes plays the creepy politician or the villainous step father, amongst other roles. My most recent “that guy” moment was when I was watching the HBO series Deadwood, in which Tobolowsky shows up as a crooked commissioner.

The obvious point which complicates Tobolowsky’s status as That Guy, is his seminal role as Ned Ryerson in 1993’s Groundhog Day. “Ned? Ned Ryerson? Ned the Head? Needle-nose Ned?” In the comments last week, I was arguing that, for instance, the guy that played Puddy in Seinfeld doesn’t count as a That Guy because he’s just known as Puddy, too iconic a label to give him That Guy status. And this may be the case with Tobolowsky, as many people out there will always remember him as Ned “Bing Again!” Ryerson. However, I think in the 15 years since that role, Tobolowsky has made so many movies and taken so many (minor) roles, that he’s overcome his Ned-ness to become a bonafide That Guy.

Here’s something I found on youtube that has Tobolowsky in it:

Wow! What a That Guy!

As further evidence, Tobolowsky was also That Guy in The Insider, Memento, and Spaceballs, not to mention, like, every TV show ever.

Street Fighter Alpha Hyper Combo Wallpaper!

nick marino — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 10:06:04 +0000

DOWNLOAD WALLPAPER :: 1280 X 1024 :: 1440 X 900 :: 1600 X 1200

Street Fighter Month chugs along! Git yer booty back here next Monday for more Hyper Combo Wallpaper!

Cyborg (1989) – TXT Message Review

nick marino — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 10:06:35 +0000

Cyborg (1989) – 1/10 – Interesting idea but completely unwatchable. Even Jean-Claude is a dud here. Maybe his worst performance.