AudioShocker

sehtolc raeppasid!

Ain't nothing wrong with a little consumerism. As America starts counting down shopping days, it's only fitting that we share with you our wish lists. While none of these items are for sale - feel free to send us presents.

9. Paul Allen's Octopus Yacht - This thing has 2 helicopters and a gaggle of jetskis -- but that is just for starters. Sign us up for two.

8. Three wishes granted by Zatanna - A little piglatin and she can make anything happen; that is infinitely better than some blue skinned, harem pant wearing, Robin Williams voiced cartoon.

7. Global ban on Tyler Perry and M. Night Shyamlan - Really, how on earth are these two dudes still getting work?

6. 50 Cent's debut R&B album - Can you fathom how awesome a disc of Curtis Jackson crooning ballads would be? It would blow Before I Self Destruct out of the freaking water. It'll never happen, but I can dream.

ALF, wing man extraordinaire

5. Guest spot on Alf - Nick would most likely dirty his dungarees were this possible. I mean, imagine all the crazy hijinks with a wingman like Gordon Shumway.

4. Bootjets - Oh wait, these are like 10000% unavailable. Perhaps a more realistic question is: where the eff is my flying car already?

3. Diplomats reunion (minus Jim Jones) - Look, Diplomatic Immunity Vols. 1&2 were major and Santana's From Me To U was a classic. All I am asking is for the boys from Harlem to bury the hatchet for like 4 hours.

2. Another 'First 100 Days' for Obama - ZING! No seriously, America's CEO could use a do-over.

1. More listeners - Tell your friends, your coworkers, your boss, your boss's boss, your boss's boss's mistress: The AudioShocker Podcast wants your ears (but not in a creepy ear-necklace sort of way).

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome!