Monthly Archive for June, 2009Page 4 of 4

A Bigger & Badder Pittsburgh Podcast Crossover?

Pittsburgh Podcast Crossover flyerNot to be outdone by ourselves, the AudioShocker has organized a massive Pittsburgh Podcast Crossover. We're joining forces with the fantastic Comic Book Pitt and the stupendous Yamagato podcasts, and we're going to be recording this historic event LIVE at Phantom of the Attic (PotA) Comics in Pittsburgh, PA!!!

This 2009 Eisner-nominated comic book shop will house the world's biggest and baddest comic book podcast crossover ever at 12PM on Sunday, June 14, 2009. Headquartered at 411 S Craig St in the Oakland neighborhood of Pittsburgh, this is going to be a mega podcast event featuring the recording of AudioShocker Podcast #84 as well as your chance to win FREE AudioShocker t-shirts!

Here's a schedule of our upcoming podcast awesomeness:

  • Tuesday, June 9, 2009 - AudioShocker Podcast #82*
  • Wednesday, June 10, 2009 - A Podcast with Ross and Nick #1
  • Sunday, June 14, 2009 - Pittsburgh Podcast Crossover @ PotA
  • Tuesday, June 16, 2009 - AudioShocker Podcast #84*
  • Wednesday, June 17, 2009 - A Podcast with Ross and Nick #2

* Confused? See, AudioShocker Podcast #83 ran this past Tuesday. Why? Because we decided to skip #82 in honor of our fallen episode (and just in case the lost audio ever found its way to my Google Voice inbox, which it did). That's why the Pittsburgh Podcast Crossover will air in AudioShocker Podcast #84 and not #83.

A Podcast with WHO and WHO?

Here at the AudioShocker, we've got some awesome podcast developments brewing in the very near future.

First up, on this Tuesday, June 9, 2009, we have the shocking return of AudioShocker Podcast #82. This podcast audio was initially lost due to a technical mistake with Google Voice, but we held out hope and ran #83 last Tuesday just in case a miracle happened...

AND happen it did! Tom from Google Voice read my bitchy blog post and saved my conversation with Ross Campbell from permanent deletion. So take a trip back in time and listen to #82 this Tuesday.

Then make sure to get your ass back here the very next day for A Podcast with Ross and Nick #1, a direct continuation of AudioShocker Podcast #82. Airing Wednesday, June 10, 2009, this show is the debut episode of a brand new weekly AudioShocker podcast series. Comic book writer/artist Ross Campbell and I will be talking about whatever the fuck we want, including comics, movies, real-life superheroes, domain renewal scams, and tons more.

So keep it locked on the AudioShocker as we continue to bring you the most ridiculous conversation on music, movies, comics, TV, video games, and tons more... now TWICE a week!!!

The Top 9 Guesses at What the Fuck Is Going on with Captain America

Some of you AudioShockerlings may not be familiar with the premise behind this Top 9, so I'll explain it quick: Captain America #600 is receiving an unprecedented Monday (instead of Wednesday) release on June 15th, 2009. Then, only weeks later, Marvel Comics is putting out the Reborn miniseries by the current writer of Captain America (and the first issue features a cover with Cap's star on it and nothing else). Marvel Comics loves the limelight, so they obviously have something big going on.

A few things to know: Captain America is dead. Well, erm, actually, Steve Rogers is dead. He got shot a few years ago. He's almost always been Cap, but now his former WWII protege is wearing the red, white, and blues. Also, the "solicitation" copy (a.k.a. the description) of Reborn #1 will be revealed on June 16th, the day after Cap #600 hits. And there's a Captain America movie slated for the summer of 2011. So it's all interconnected and there's some secretive shit going down.

So what the fuck is really going on with Captain America? Here are my most educated and asinine guesses:

9. Captain America was raped by Doctor Light. To start some sort of 21st century Marvel Comics / DC Comics crossover, the companies have decided to show us that sexual abuse isn't just for the ladies anymore. One day, Doctor Light snuck into the Avengers Mansion and took Steve Rogers from behind when he wasn't looking. Hilarity ensues.

8. Captain America raped Doctor Light. Seems a little more shocking than the alternative, doesn't it?

7. Steve Rogers never died, he was just a Skrull the whole damn time. Since Steve's corpse received a secret burial at sea by Iron Man, Hank Pym, Namor, and the Wasp, not too many folks actually saw the body of Captain America for the last time. Wasp kicked the bucket in Secret Invasion, Tony Stark is currently erasing his entire brain while on the run from the US government, and Namor is busy ogling Emma Frost's boobies all day long. Conveniently, Hank Pym was actually a Skrull at that time (and thus will be referred to as Skank Pym from here on out). After the four of them dumped Steve's "corpse" into the Arctic Ocean, Skank Pym went down there and picked up the Steve Rogers impersonator (who was just feigning death). As Reborn #1 opens, Skank Pym and fake Steve are headed back to their Skrull spaceship where the crew is currently in the process of anally probing the real Steve Rogers just for kicks.

6. Sharon Carter is going to give birth to an elderly Steve Rogers who will de-age to be Captain America again. The title of the upcoming miniseries is reborn... so what if that title was literal? Inspired by the success of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Marvel Comics has decided to literally have Steve Rogers reemerge from the womb. How? Time travel, of course! Sharon Carter, Cap's secret agent girlfriend, thinks that she was impregnated by Steve Rogers shortly before he died. She's wrong. She was actually impregnated by an android from the future. First, the android traveled back in time to secure a sample of semen from Steve Rogers' father. Then it headed back to the future where the semen was genetically engineered to include a preexisting dosage of the Super Solider Serum. Then the android traveled to the exact point in time where Steve and Sharon were getting ready to have hot and heavy sex. The android drugged Steve and took his place. After doing the deed, the android returned home to the future. Back in our present, despite being "de-pregnated" by the Red Skull, Sharon Carter gives birth to an elderly Steve Rogers. She cares for him until Cap can get the shield swinging again. And then, in a shocking twist.. they become lovers! That's right - Sharon starts getting it on with the superhero who emerged from her own vagina as a 90-year-old man. Now that's entertainment.

5. Captain America was raped by Sharon Carter. Though not nearly as shocking as other scenarios, it provides an interesting backdrop for an exploration of female-on-male sexual abuse. The collected edition of this story will be in bookstores just in time for the Captain America movie.

4. The new Captain America is Batman. Over at DC Comics, everyone thinks Batman is dead. Actually, Bruce Wayne is just lost in reality. Reborn opens as the Caped Crusader is shifting across multiple different alternate realities, trying to find his way home. Bats ends up in the Marvel Universe, where he decides to have some fun and suit up as the Star Spangled Avenger. Image the merchandising and cross-promotion possibilities for Marvel and DC. We're talking big bucks, baby! Big bucks!!!

3. Steve Rogers was actually Barack Obama the whole time. Nothing sells comic books nowadays like a guest appearance by Barack Obama. Not to be outdone by the competition, Marvel Comics has decided to secretly make our 44th American president the Sentinel of Liberty. The reason Cap was "shot" in the first place? So Obama could have more time to run for president. Now that he's president, Obama wants to get back to kicking ass... Captain America style! Also, this would coordinate well with the rumor that Marvel Studios wants to cast Will Smith as Captain America. This way, Smith gets to play both Barack Obama AND Captain America in the same time movie.

2. Captain America raped Barack Obama. Seems eve more shocking than the other alternatives, doesn't it?

1. Captain America was actually Hitler the entire time. At some point during WWII, Hitler managed to kill Steve Rogers. But instead of bragging about it, Hitler decided to put on Cap's costume and impersonate him (sans creepy moustache, of course). Fast forward a year or so, and Adolf is tired of fighting the war. He fakes BOTH of his own deaths and goes underground. Years later, after extensive genetic modification, he reemerges as the "unfrozen" Captain America and joins the Avengers. He proceeds to pretend to be Steve Rogers for far longer than anyone could ever imagine. Sick of the endless charade, Adolf fakes his own death AGAIN and goes underground to plot his rebirth. In Reborn, Hitler reveals his master plan and shocks everyone by proving that he was Captain America the whole time. Then he rapes Barack Obama. The end.

More: The Top 9 Currently Dead Superheroes and Supervillains

Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.

Click here to visit the AudioShocker Store!

Spider-Man & Captain America in LOWER LEVEL DEMON

Spider-Man and Captain America

Kill him, Cap. Just put him out of his misery.

Iron Man #256 Is...

... an interesting collaboration between Bob Layton and John Romita, Jr.

This 1990 issue falls at the end of Bob Layton's second lengthy run on the title (David Michelinie is, sadly, not involved with this one). And, if I'm not mistaken, this issue marks JRjr's first work on the Iron Man series. So it's like a passing of the torch in a creative respect, since JRjr will go on to draw Armor Wars II as written by John Byrne.

And speaking of Romita, Jr., he's in top form here. The guy has had many different qualities to his style over the years, and I think that Iron Man #256 catches him at one of his peaks. In particular, his faces reach an artistic pinnacle here, finding a balance between his previous work on Uncanny X-Men and his later work on Spider-Man. Rhodey looks especially excellent. In fact, I think JRjr's Rhodey is my favorite visual depiction of the character (out of costume, of course).

As for story in this issue, Tony Stark ventures out to his nearly decimated orbiting space station to attempt a little bit of cleanup. Max Cauwfield of Cauwfield Chemical has designed a way for Tony to fix up the damage that AIM did to the space station earlier in the series, and Tony jumps at the chance to get his station functioning again.

And when I say earlier in the series, I mean 40 issues previous to this tale. That's one slow burn plot element! However long it took to cook to the surface, though, it's gratifying to see a character revisit an old plot element and make good on the dangling plot threads from years before.

Of course, things don't go to plan and Iron Man's journey out to the fringes of Earth's orbit make for a fascinating and introspective solo jaunt. I truly enjoyed the storytelling here, almost as much as I enjoyed Len Kaminski's run on the title.

Speaking of Kaminski, he too will revive the space station plot element at a later date, pitting Shellhead against the Technovore supervillain in Iron Man #294-295. The Technovore is mad science gone wrong, as Cauwfield's organization was performing dangerous experiments in Tony's oribital station and things got a bit out of hand and then there was an accident and... well, let's just say that Technovore is a classic Len Kaminski technology monster and leave it at that.

Point is, Iron Man #256 is sort of like the midway point in a trilogy of spread out tales, ranging from the fight with AIM in Iron Man #215 to this "clean up" in #256 to the eventual battle against Technovore in #294. This excellent story is allow to gestate and build in the background of Tony Stark's life over the course of no less than 80 issues. In my mind, that's an awesome achievement.

Batman and Robin #1...

... was pretty good.

It's always nice to see Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely working together. I've been reading Flex Mentallo slowly over the past few weeks, and it's great to contrast that collaboration with this new effort.

Interestingly, the art in this comic feels very contained in some places. Certain panels almost make me feel claustrophobic at times. Still, I think this compressed type of art induces the desired effect when Quitely shifts to a splash page or a spread, so in that sense, it's very successful.

I'd like to see a bit more of Dick Grayson's lighthearted attitude. It's genuinely fun to get a Caped Crusader that's not full of angst. I'd just like a little bit more of that fun. Granted, it was only 22 pages and we didn't even see one hand-to-hand fight yet, so I'm sure some more of Dick's acrobatics are yet to come. I look forward to those moments.

All in all, I'm glad I snagged this issue and I look forward to more like it.

Laughing With Regina Spektor (at you)

I don't know how many times I have mentioned her before, but is any female vocalist more slept on than Regina Spektor? I mean, people know who she is, they like her music and all, but Regina has yet to attain that Tori Amos or even Fiona Apple type of fame. And it isn't like the hipsters aren't doing their part. So, I suppose this weighty burden falls upon my shoulders.

Regina's new album Far drops on the 23rd, and Laughing With is the lead single. I know nothing about it, so I won't color my expectations with online press/junket crap. Instead, I will say I am super effing psyched. I loved her last disc, Begin to Hope, and I ended up getting all her previous stuff and seeing her live in Chicago back in 2007. I was a bit fanatical then. But hey, what's wrong with being a Regina Stan?

Laughing With seems to be a departure from the typical Regina. There is little if any dynamic range to the vocals and the piano track is way too smooth. You would never guess that this cute redhead was capable of ballbusting tracks like Flyin, Hotel Song, or Poor Little Rich Boy. Which actually brings up a sidepoint that some of her best tracks have very little piano in them at all. (Sacrilege, I know). And where is the catchy hook? Everyone knows a good lead single has to have a catchy hook!

I'm not saying I hate it, but I am saying it isn't what I was hoping for. I wanted Regina to come flying out of the gate like she did last time. Compare Laughing With to Regina's last lead single Fidelity. Fidelity is infinitely better, both acoustically and visually. It is an engaging song with highs and lows and a cute video to match. Laughing With is a downer with a boring video. Fidelity built up to a fun ending, while Laughing With ends just as lackadaisically as it began.

So Regina, I take back my comment from earlier this year back, you were never on my "shitlist", just my "come on release something already!" list. That said - I am praying for a killer second single. Laughing With is a weak effort and I know you are capable of something 10x better.

Ed Note: Moving sucks. I'm in the process of moving out and it is just a total mess. Selling furniture, putting stuff in storage, cleaning the place, paring down to the essentials - blah blah blah. The only joy I get is from tossing stuff in the dumpster. Obviously this is no excuse for irregular posting, but try to be sympathetic, ok?

Click here to visit the AudioShocker Store!

AudioShocker Podcast #83 - The Time Traveling Dildo Salvation Experience

AudioShocker Podcast #83Sasha Grey in The Girlfriend Experience by Steven Soderbergh, Jean-Claude Van Damme in Timecop, the Mortal Kombat movie, 27 Dresses getting worn by Katherine Heigl, Coraline and Neil Gaiman, Hip Hop is Read and Colin Munroe, Terminator Salvation cannot be saved by Christian Bale, Len Kaminski and Iron Man #306 got ripped off by Google, Robot 13 by Thomas Hall and Daniel Bradford is pretty awesome, and, of course, mucho more.

P.S. No. You are not losing your mind. AudioShocker Podcast #82 never happened. It had... issues. And since there is a slight chance it may yet get recovered, we moved onto #83 in the meantime.

Culturology 033 - Just Because They're Not After Me

The wonder-beautiful month of May has swept on by, in a mere blink of the culturological eye. And no wonder, given the steady stream of blockbusters that seeped out of Hollywood’s underclothing every weekend. Watching movies is a bit like watching baseball: after the first month of the season, one is tempted to draw major conclusions and determine how the whole season is going to play out, but must bide ones time as well, as so much is certain to change as the weeks progress. But it was a pretty good month for movies, all things considered (well, not all things… I really only went out to like three movies (I would’ve seen Up, but I was out of town over the weekend, and my friends all went to see it without me, and since I more or less make it a rule to never go to movies by myself, I probably won’t see it until its eventual DVD release)), and to me, the movie the really tied the month together, and gives the best sense of what the summer might hold is Terminator: Salvation.

Star Trek was great, Wolverine pretty much blew (apologies, as usual, to Nick, for my failing to find its stalwart action movie tropes to be as exciting and enjoyable as I should have), and Terminator falls somewhere in the middle. Where I was hesitant to compare Star Trek and Wolverine, I feel the opposite impulse between the latter and Terminator. Mostly ‘cause they’re both more or less straight-up sci-fi/action flicks, and both come from similar pedigrees (having two quite good movies been made in their franchises with questionable third movies—though T-3 was way way better than X-Men 3). Wolverine riding his motorcycle out of an exploding barn? Meh. T-800 jumping off an exploding bridge holding an axe and using that axe to climb onto a giant flying robot? Awesome!

Beyond the explosions-and-leaping comparison, the obvious choice to put against each other are the special effects; it’s very easy to say “Terminator looked much better, and was therefore the better movie.” In fact, it’s one of those arenas where I have the most trouble getting an objective sense of my own taste. Ideally, I wouldn’t really care one way or the other about the look of the movie, and gauge it more for its editing/action/pacing, but its hard to ignore the fact that Wolverine looked so cheap and careless, whereas Terminator (and Star Trek, for the matter) had much bigger budgets (though also, arguably, more of a need for those effects) for the computer graphics. But sci-fi is one of those genres where I think it does matter. Look at Star Wars: what was it that separated those first three Star Wars movies from the pack of all the rest of the sci-fi in the ‘70s? It’s set-design, specifically the darkness of its sets (this isn’t necessarily something that I feel like I can actually fully argue, but it’s been my sense for a long time that the only reason Star Wars was ever popular is because of the darkness of its sets). Terminator 2? The Matrix? Special effects are what cement their place in action/sci-fi movie history. Total Recall sits at the absolute pinnacle of the greatness of pre-CGI special effects. Tron. Darren Aronofsky’s The Fountain will eventually have massive cult status for its non-computer-generated sci-fi backdrops. Jurassic Park. Even Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey, a movie which exists in its own special corner of science fiction (I think its one of the best spaceship movies ever made), was recognized for its special effects—it was the “ultimate trip”.

Much rarer is the sci-fi movie known for its awesomeness without its effects. Robo-Cop is the one movie that springs to mind. Maybe Tremors. All the Star Trek movies seem to skirt the issue pretty well (despite whatever amount of mockery of the original TV show). And there are certainly movies that had great effects but sucked so much that it didn’t matter (though I’m drawing a blank here at the moment). So if Wolverine’s claws hadn’t looked so shitty, would it have been a better movie? It might have been—it may well at least have been way more enjoyable. But its main problem lies deeper than its half-assed visual sense: Wolverine utterly lacked ambition in its film making. Not that Terminator: Salvation set any records for mind-blowingly good ideas, but there was at least sense through all of its set-pieces that it knew it was going up against classics of the genre in its forebears, so had to provide some novelty to it. Compared to Terminator, Wolverine seems more like a B-movie than a blockbuster.

Culturology Summer of Booklove Book Club #2: A Scanner Darkly

As soon as I started reading this book, I realized that I should have picked a different Philip K. Dick book than this one. Although it certainly exemplifies a major piece of the PKD puzzle, its way more of a drug novel than real sci-fi. During the passages of the book where its just junkies hanging out and rapping with each other, it might as well be taking place in the mid-70s, rather than the imaginary 1997 of its fictional future. So I apologize for that; but there are still some interesting things to talk about here.

Philip K. Dick is known, of course, for his long-standing popularity as a writer whose books or stories are prime material for movie making. Blade Runner, Total Recall, Minority Report, Paycheck, and many more were all based on PKD material. Part of the reason I picked A Scanner Darkly was because Linklater made a movie version of it a couple of years ago which I haven’t seen yet, and figured that at some point this summer I can spend some quality blog-time bitching about it (Linklater being about the least interesting (and most annoying) of the current set of young American filmmakers). But after reading the book, I’m not even sure that I would care to defend it against even a crappy film adaptation.

Its basic premise is pretty cool. In the future, drugs will be more powerful and more harmful than what they were, drug manufacturers will be more powerful as well, and the police will be more impotent than ever in stopping the trade. So Fred ends up narcing, and using his fair share of Substance D, which causes his brain to split in half (a trendy idea for a while there, back in the sci-fi day; the other must-read of split brain sci-fi being Stanislaw Lem’s Peace on Earth), and is commanded to narc on himself as Bob Arctor. Bob/Fred is a sad character. And given PKD’s own history of drug abuse (apparently it was something like a massive acid trip/schizophrenic episode which launched him into the last phase of his novel writing, which was massively paranoid and infused with Gnostic religious leanings (see the VALIS trilogy, for instance)), I struggled in reading it to not just associate Bob/Fred with some vision of the actual Philip K. Dick. PKD also, apparently, for a while, had decided that the FBI was watching him, so started mailing them letters where he would narc on himself, so the paranoia that soaks through Scanner perhaps works so effectively because its writer really believed in it.

The idea of the drug manufacturer’s turning addicts into zombies in order to add them to their own numbers is appealing too, though it’s hard to see any kind of real-life analogue to it. It’s interesting to me, since we only get that information at the tail end of the book, but it’s really a scheme worthy of a mastermind criminal’s epic climactic “I did it” speech. I do enjoy paranoid fiction—Pynchon’s novels are all great for it—the sense that the world is built up of these massive schemes that the average person has no control over. The two basic ways to pay off paranoia plots are obvious enough: either someone is pulling all the strings, or no one is. I personally lean towards the no-mastermind plot resolution, but I think A Scanner Darkly’s ties up in a satisfactory way; if the drugs make you paranoid, it probably does work better for there to turn out to actual be a massive, carefully controlled scheme working against you.

Next Week: Murakami's The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle

For July 6th: Sharp Teeth

For August 3rd: Michael Chabon's Gentlemen of the Road

Venom (Gone Fishing) Hyper Combo Wallpaper!

Venom is gone fishing

Mmm hmmm! Venom is gonna eat good tonight!!!

DOWNLOAD WALLPAPER :: 1280 X 1024 :: 1440 X 900 :: 1600 X 1200

It's Venom. He's fishing. What more can I say? Marvel vs. Capcom wouldn't be the same without Eddie Brock and his symbiote suit from space.

Honestly, I forget where I found this picture. The important thing to know is that this is the first part of a Venom wallpaper double-shot. Be back here next Monday for a new Venom Hyper Combo Wallpaper!