Everyone is all like, "WAHHHH! The Wolverine movie wasn't good enough! Boo-hoo!" I say FUCK 'EM! X-Men Origins: Wolverine was balls-to-the-wall fun both times I saw it. Here are the Top 9 the silliest and most wonderful moments from this blockbuster popcorn epic.
9. For some odd reason, a Hugh Jackman lookalike was cast in the role of Wolvie's father. This would be all well and good if it weren't for the fact that the guy playing Wolverine's father actually turns out NOT to be Wolverine's father. Did the casting director even read the script?
8. Nobody at a thuggish New Orleans dive bar seems to notice the ridiculously extravagant poker player wearing a top hat and shuffling cards with his arms stretched wide like a bad stage magician. Never mind the fact that he goes by the name Remy.
7. When Logan spies a decapitated bear head casually laying around his lumberjack work site, he logically jumps to the conclusion that Sabretooth must be nearby (because, ya know, severed bear heads follow Victor Creed like the scent of cheap perfume on an ugly hooker).
6. An elderly couple spies Logan as he goes streaking across their secluded Canadian farm (unbeknownst to them, naked Wolvie just escaped from the Weapon X project).
5. To portray mutant teleporter John Wraith, apparently will.i.am raided Burt Reynolds' closet circa 1978.
4. Remember that elderly couple? Yeah, Agent Zero picks them off through a small, dirty barn window. They drop dead and Wolvie gets mad. Then Stryker and Zero blow up the barn. Exploding barns = AWESOME.
3. Naked Wolverine jumps into a waterfall to escape the Weapon X project. I know it should have been an exciting moment, but all I could think was, "Oh shit. That's gonna be really fucking cold. SHRINKAGE!"
2. Wolverine goes one-on-one in the boxing ring with a severely overweight Fred Dukes to get some answers about Stryker's plans. Fred's enormous, jiggly man-boobs are going to give me nightmares tonight. I guarantee it.
1. Logan learns he's been double-crossed in the worst way when Silver Fox is revealed to be alive and well, employed by Stryker at his "secret" military base... which begs the question: did she fake every orgasm?
More: The Top 9 Most Intimidating Supervillains! (Featuring no less than two (2!) of the characters from X-Men Origins: Wolverine.)
Why the Top 9? Because 10 is too many and 9 is better. 3 X 3 = Awesome. Now that’s what I call math.
i think that was a severed WOLVERINE head...
I loved every expolding, card-shuffling, one-liner, claw-busting moment of it. I want to see it again. Hugh, good onya, mate, & a job well-done, since you were a major part of the producing/directing end. Took forever to wait for this movie, for me(3 yrs), but it was worth the wait. I know it did seem to have some cheesy moments, & if anyone hasn't seen the very ending, then you need to go back to the theatre & see it again. This time, stay after the credits have rolled.
P.S. So what that the one guy's name was Remy. Who cares?? It was a very cajun name, & the guy from T.V.'s "Friday Night Lights" played him, & is a serious hottie. I think I will have to tune into that show, now, since seeing him in this flick. Yum.
pffff. the incongruity of a cajun name/backstory and a distinctly NON-cajun accent is not mitigated by being a hottie.
AudioShocker Shoutouts!
Never underestimate hotness, Neal. Never.
Hey. Hey. Hey. I'm willing to look past crappy singing voices in deference to hotness when it comes to my R&B girls - but for not accents in superhero movies. That is like saying: Alan Cumming was hot as Nightcrawler, so it'd be cool if they had fucked up the *BAMF* sound.
ya know, the wolverine head thing was totally lost on me. but i get it now. it had to be one, and not a bear.
m-n-m, the remy thing was a joke. i mean, i've been reading him in the comics for about 20 years now and his name has always been remy.
AND i strongly urge people not to stay past the credits. i actually think that the secret endings in Wolvie - while awesome in that there are two of them - are not very good. the Deadpool one is pretty weak and the Wolvie one goes nowhere. that said, i still love this movie.
and Neal, did they give Nightcrawler a BAMF sound in X2?
AudioShocker Shoutouts!
